The 8 G.I. Joes Most Frequently Left In the Box
For any young boy coming of age in the late 1980s there was one primary source for both patriotic fervor and unmitigated violence, and that was G.I. Joe. Yes, there was nothing quite like the Joes to inspire a love for one's nation, instill a strong moral compass, or sometimes just provoke an ineffective but passionate child fistfight over who gets be Snake Eyes this round. Before the cartoon, there was only one G.I. Joe.
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You can buy Robert's book, Everything is Going to Kill Everybody: The Terrifyingly Real Ways the World Wants You Dead, or follow him on Twitter and Facebook or you can go right ahead and pick first. Yeah? You pick Hawk? Awesome. I pick Optimus Fucking Prime. That's right: I brought an Autobot to a Joe fight. That's how I roll, bitches.