5 Responsible Ways To Mock Everything
|How do you start to ridicule something we already all agree is ridiculous?|
Is it Too Inane to Mock? Replace it with Something.There's no worse place for a lack of stimuli than the grocery aisle. An active comedic mind may go into overload with the number of stupid headlines that will assault you. For example, you might see "Toby Keith Gets Rowdy," or "Miley Cyrus: Sixteen and Sassy!" Do you realize how much you have to not give a fuck to type that and put that in front of another person's eyeballs? You can't mock something that has no shame. So here's what you can do. Take the mess that their idiot copywriter vomited on to the cover and replace it with something more appropriate. Here's one to get you started. The September 2006 issue of Rolling Stone had a cover feature of Justin Timberlake in a wet t-shirt called "WET DREAM!" That's fucking stupid. And pointless. So I changed it. To Justin Timberlake - WHAT A MOUSTACHE FEELS LIKE ON YOUR DICK. Buy a dryer, N*Sync. If you're not feeling especially creative while you wait to buy groceries, you don't have to write your own. You can have just as much fun by simply taking a headline from one magazine and putting it on another. "Bat Boy Found in Cave!" is yesterday's news on the cover of Weekly World News, but strangely fitting when placed on US Weekly under a picture of a tiny orc that doctors pulled from a science-savaged uterus.
Is it Totally Insane? Make it Make Sense.When encountering something that deviates from normalcy, it's easy to call it nuts and be done with it. Well one of the skills I picked up arguing with women is the ability to follow a trail of dislogic back to its source to see how something insane came to be. Now it can be used for comedy as well!For instance, you might one day visit the website of celebrity Leonard Nimoy,
Touchy Subject? Change the Context.For this example, I'll use something we can all agree on: women without shirts. As you know, after a certain time of night, every commercial on TV is about drunk girls showing their tits. I don't get why. It's reassuring to know that they're out there doing that, but what the fuck am I going to do with a DVD set of it? Like I have the time and imagination to force a jerk-off out of partial nudity. Sure, I remember the days of sitting through three straight Shannon Tweed movies with a hard-on on deck and frantically trying to get something done with a precious second of side boob. But that was when I was 13, and before I learned of the dangers of erections lasting longer than four hours. When you're a kid you have to treat pornography like you treat a Nintendo game. As unforgiving or terrible as it might be, you and your hands will keep fighting to the end because you have nothing better to do and you can't go buy a new one. Now that I've grown up, I don't have to spend weeks earning my doctorate in Battletoads so I can see how their Battletoad story turns out. And I don't have to create elaborate situations in my head to keep a page of Sears bra models fresh. I can buy the novelization of