7 Awesome Things That Suck If Mixed With Anything Else
Not everything is chocolate and peanut butter. There are some things, while great on their own, that are chemically transformed into disaster when you mix them with any other ingredient. Let's look at the facts. By itself, America rules. It's both number one and its colors don't run. But what happens when you mix America with a second concept? Disaster. American Ninjas are the shittiest of all Ninjas; mixing America with Cheese makes condom-flavored bathroom tiles; and you don't even want to know what happens when you mix "America" with "North Man/Boy Love Association." Below are seven other concepts that simply can't mix with others. 7. Rap Rapping doesn't seem that hard, and it's often enjoyable when it's just being rap. Sometimes it's even awesome like during Hulk Hogan's hit song "I Wanna Be a Hulkamaniac." But you have to be very careful what your agenda is when you're producing a rap song. Is it to tell everyone that you're terrific? Fine. Is it about how you're going to kill the listener and/or fuck them from behind? That's fine too. But don't rap if you're teaching your employees how to grill hamburgers. The only thing that's going to do is get your employees to wonder why your mother thought anal thermometers were pre-natal vitamins. If you're rapping about furniture savings, fire safety or basically anything other than enjoying the song currently being rapped, I have bad news: everyone just found out you're a goddamn idiot. I'm too sure of this to experiment with it, but I think if you ever rap a
weather report, your dick and chest hair take that as a clear message you don't need them anymore. And if you ever write a rap about mattress sales incentive programs, go ahead and also write an email to every woman you want to sleep with about your mouth fungus.
That's not to say it's impossible to get your agenda across when using rap. Ever since I heard this