Every one of us has wondered why Twilight was popular, and before that why Anne Rice books seemed to fly off the shelves, and before that why Vampire in Brooklyn was clearly Eddie Murphy's greatest cinematic triumph. Why the s**t do people love vampires so much, especially as they get lamer and lamer with the passage of time? Remember Nosferatu? That dude was gross nasty. Then we end up with Edward Cullen who threatened to step into the sunlight and explode into a bouquet of Faberge vaginas at any moment. What happened? Sex happened.
The psychology of vampires is very much centered in a female audience and very much focused entirely, in every possible way, around sexual fantasy. Now many of you ladies may be thinking, "I'd rather someone beat me to death with a leg of lamb than endure 10 minutes of Twilight," and I would say bless you.
For resisting those beautiful golden eyes, if nothing else.
But that just means you're "the fringe." No story will appeal to everyone, and the numbers behind Twilight's popularity don't lie. You can hate it because 10 other women apparently couldn't watch it without ruining their seat.
The vampire is the ultimate bad boy. He's not even human, but he is. And handsome. And his existence depends on blood. Your blood. Your vitality -- your essence -- is what he craves and needs. And maybe in old fiction, he'd savage you in an alley and murder you for it, but how does it work in these gushy vampire movies? He needs your permission to come in. He f**kin' courts you like an eyeliner-sporting Cyrano.