As you have probably guessed, bufotoxins can get you seriously high, as some enterprizing space cadets discovered by squeezing the foamy goo out of the toad's horns, drying into a film and smoking it.
The composition of bufotoxin is similar to what is found in some mushrooms, a mixture that includes both DMT and epinephrine. This basically means that a hallucinogen and an adrenergic are joining forces like Chuck Norris and Lou Gosset, Jr. in Firewalker to kick the shit out of your mind. The drug is so intense that unlike most of the entries on this list, extracting and trafficking bufotoxins is ranked right up there with heroin and cocaine on the Against-the-Law-O-Meter.
Like snakes, spiders and Queen Latifah, scorpions are something most of us can agree are better off left in the depths of our nightmares, or on German pop stations. Being repeatedly stung by scorpions is one of the levels of Hell observed by Dante, right? But what's that? Some people actually sting themselves with scorpions on purpose? For fun?
And voluntarily saw Beauty Shop? What the fuck?
Yes. Yes, they do. While the venom of most scorpions is relatively harmless to humans (merely causing skin irritation not unlike a mosquito bite or bee sting), some species of scorpion contain powerful neurotoxins. These particular poisons play all sorts of havoc with neural receptors. Imagine letting a five-year-old play with a whole city's traffic lights for a day, except in your brain.
But, as we've seen, the line between poison and narcotic is thin and fuzzy. Here the venom often causes a massive release of serotonin, making the venom operate a lot like an opiate, which is a drug more commonly found along avenues that don't involve willful mutilation at the hands of a cold, unfeeling arachnid.
"I don't give a shit."
The effects can be quite similar to heroin. Sadly, this means that it is not unheard of for junkies to wander off into the desert looking for scorpions to sting themselves with to stave off withdrawals a little longer.
Get a job, you fucking junkies!
This may or may not be healthier than heroin (we're pretty sure there's no danger in sharing scorpions, but if you're depending on one of the harshest-looking predators in existence for your high we assume hepatitis is not a major concern for you), but either way we really hope nobody's leaving used scorpions lying around playgrounds. That's just dirty pool.
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For animals that go to great lengths to get stoned, check out 7 Species That Get High More Than We Do. Or find out about how humans are way behind on the learning curve, in 6 Modern Technologies Animals Invented Millions of Years Ago.
And stop by Cracked.com's Top Picks to see Gladstone licking toads while we all laugh.
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