A.I. ‘Simpsons’ Characters Are Being Used to Hawk Anti-Masturbation Apps
Last year’s season premiere of The Simpsons enlisted the help of guest star Conan O’Brien to answer the question: “What if A.I. wrote an epic finale for the show?” And now, some creepy app company has answered the question: “What if A.I. used Simpsons characters to battle chronic masturbation?”
To be clear, Conan is in no way involved with the latter.
Engaging with social media these days means putting up with loads of trashy ads for companies you’ve never heard of, some of which involve the criminal activities of Howie Mandel and Michael Cera. Recently, some folks have been seeing a video promoting an app called Liven, which, according to their website, “helps you reframe the inner dialogue, boost your self-image, and view daily challenges with fresh eyes.”
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How? Well, for starters, it wants you to stop jerking off all the time.
In their video, Liven shows us all what “unrecognized masturbation addiction looks like.” And apparently, it’s a cartoon couple, rendered in the style of The Simpsons, and their arms are crossed in bed? That doesn’t seem so bad.
The mustachioed protagonist of this baffling commercial is later seen crying in a corner thanks to his “excessive masturbation.” Oh, and the style of the animation radically shifts to a more Pixar-like look with zero explanation. And the seemingly A.I.-generated slop is accompanied by what we hope is an A.I.-generated song, and not an actual human being’s attempt at making music.
Another godawful A.I. ad from the same company focuses on “dopamine addiction in women,” and stars a soulless Muppet clone.
Putting aside the fact that several people have claimed that the app is a “scam,” the A.I. Simpsons video is extra odd because its protagonist kind of looks like Ned Flanders, thanks to his giant stache. And Flanders, of all the residents of Springfield, seems like he’d be the least likely to become addicted to self-pleasure. Especially since he regularly uses corn starch to repress any sexual urges.
If this company wanted a Simpsons character to play a chronic masturbator, why not go with the guy who plans his nights around ogling women in the Sears catalogue?
Or maybe they should have gotten the guy who claims to have "masturbated eight million times” and counting.
But since Homer was once a NASA astronaut, a renowned outsider artist and Grammy-winning barbershop quartet singer, he may have contradicted that whole “masturbation equals failure” argument.
