The Man Who Was Killed By His Own Beard
A 16th-century Dutch mayor named Hans Staininger had the most magnificent face full of whiskers the world had ever seen — a hirsute magnificence that ultimately proved to be his undoing
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- By Mike Rampton
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0 The 10 Funniest ‘Brooklyn Nine-Nine’ Flashbacks
It turns out you can laugh at the past as much as you can learn from it
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- By Amanda Mannen
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Brooke Shields’ ‘Friends’ Guest Role Made Andre Agassi Throw a Trophy-Smashing Tantrum
Then again, maybe it was just the meth
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- By Keegan Kelly
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Julie Bowen’s Competition For Her Part In 'Happy Gilmore' Tried a Full Sharon Stone Reveal
Good thing Bowen followed her basic instincts.
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- By Matt Solomon
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Jay Pharoah's Dream 'Saturday Night Live' Weekend Update Host Is Anthony Jeselnik
Finally, an anchor more offensive than Jost and Che.
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- By Matt Solomon
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Tiago Svn
The depths of Final Fantasy VII's code are home to many creepy mysteries, but the most mysterious of all lives near the surface. We're talking about an entity known only as the "red guy". He's not to be confused with the actual character Red XIII or Vincent Valentine, another mysterious guy who just ikes to dress in red. Mr. Red guy is just a tiny man wearing red armor who spies on the player from behind a crate in the desert prison area of the game. He's such a great spy that most regular players and even FFVII fans have beaten the entirety of the game without even knowing he's there. For most players, he'll look like this:
Square Enix, FFVII Citadel
But some players have hacked the game, and found out that we're not alone when we visit the desert prison complex's basement, as it is inhabited by what looks like a discarded edgy steampunk revamp of Super Mario.
Square Enix, FFVII Citadel
The hackers tried engaging, and only more questions ensued. We can't talk to him because he's actually not a character but rather part of the background (and therefore an interdimensional being). Its existence naturally spawned numerous questions, such as what the hell is it, and also why is did he choose to live in a creepy pit atop a pile of bones, bones way larger than his own? Is he just overcompensating? Did he murder a dragon and is slowly eating its bones? Should we even be messing with this thing? This is a very interesting case because even after data mining, we still have no explanation for what he's doing in the game. We welcome any sort of insight that could come from anyone reading this because it's totally plausible that this man knows how to bring Aerith back.
Top Image: Square Enix
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