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You're welcome, Bully Maguire.
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JD Roberson
The gentle and sweet Bobby Hill is perhaps the best character in the entire King of the Hill series. His lazy yet curious mind keeps Hank on his Texan toes, leading to some of the best situational comedy out there. Here are 25 Bobby Hill moments we will cherish forever.
Bobby Gets Real
FOX
Hank: “Soccer was invented by European ladies to keep them busy while their husbands did the cooking.”
Bobby: "Why Do You Hate What You Don't Understand?"
Related: 5 Incredible Real Video Games (You'll Never Get to Play)
Bobby’s Birthday Hints
FOX
"Think about it, Luanne. Why would you bring a child to a department store to buy a dryer when his birthday is three and a half weeks away? It just doesn’t make sense!"
Related: Scandinavian Birthdays Are Dark AF
Bobby’s Tight Five
FOX
From Bobby’s comedy set after seeing comedian “Boudda Sac” (Chris Rock).
"And white people always be walking around like this…like they be crushing diamonds in there or something! Look at me! I’m white!”
Related: Tight Five: JT Habersaat
Bobby’s Fear Of Abduction
"My dad sure wants me to be at that haunted house. Last time he wanted me to be somewhere that bad, I woke up without tonsils.”
Never remove tonsils without enthusiastic verbal consent.
Related: Why Does Anyone Fear The Hutts?
Bobby’s Final Message To Luanne Before She Leaves
FOX
“Good-Bye, Luanne. I just wanted you to know that I never read your diary, even though you suspected I did on June 18th, 1985.”
Related: The 7 Most Soul-Crushing Series Finales in TV History
Bobby’s Time Management Skills
FOX
"I was getting ready, but I worked up an appetite looking for dress pants, so I ordered a pizza, and that ate up a chunk of time.”
How I missed my aunt's funeral.
Related: Learn a Rad New Skill in No Time with These Online Courses
Bobby’s Simple Pleasures
"Donuts were one of life’s little joys. If the government bans puppy breath and good yawns, I’ll have nothing left to live for!”
The government is gonna have to pry puppy breath from my cold dead hands.
Related: 5 Guilty Pleasures The Web Killed While You Weren't Looking
Bobby’s Vows
FOX
"Luanne, I know we’ve had our differences, but I was kinda hoping we could make up and not get married.”
Top 10 things to say at the altar to keep the guests entertained.
Related: Here's The Stupidly Cutest Celebrity Story You'll Hear Today
Bobby’s Sexual Awakening
FOX
Peggy: “What do you know about sexual relations?”
Bobby: "I don’t know. Nothing much. I'm a little worried about being a slut."
Aren’t we all, Bobby?
Related: The New 'Twilight' Book Is Gonna Force Readers To Admit That Edward Is A Sexual Predator
Bobby’s Animal Instincts
FOX
Hank: “Just remember, to catch a fish, you have to think like a fish.”
Bobby: “I'm wet and I don't even know it."
Do you think fish think that humans don’t know we are dry?
Phish and Wildlife
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Bobby’s Hygiene Routine
FOX
Bobby: “I’ve got a girlfriend now, she expects me to smell a certain way”
Hank: “Then suck it up and take a shower!
Bobby: “Eh, I don’t like to stand that long.”
Bobby obviously doesn’t know how often I find myself laying down in the shower.
Related: 6 Terrifying Predators Routinely Owned by Adorable Prey
Bobby’s Emotional Intelligence
FOX
“Would it cheer you up if I stuffed some fig newtons up my nose?”
My go-to bit when I volunteer at the terminal ward.
Related: 5 Unexpected Downsides of High Intelligence
Bobby’s Smart mouth
“To tell you the truth, dad, that sounds boring. It’s ok if you’re into boring, but I’m not.”
I truly wish he could’ve peeled out on a propane powered Harley after this line.
Related: 9 'Smart' Products Clearly Designed For Stupid Rich People
Bobby’s Guitar Skills
FOX
"Hey, look at me! I'm Eddie Cheddar!"
Related: Learning The Guitar Will Make You Less Lame
Bobby’s Self Defense
FOX
"I don’t know you! That’s my purse!"
TikTok thanks you for this sound, Bobby.
Related: 6 Real Acts of Self Defense Too Awesome for an Action Movie
Bobby’s Culinary Critiques
FOX
“My Sloppy Joe is all sloppy, and no Joe."
Petition to change the name of “Sloppy Joes” to just “Sloppies.”
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Bobby’s Vow
FOX
“I’ll never use toilet paper in anger again”
Related: Here's The Stupidly Cutest Celebrity Story You'll Hear Today
Bobby’s Respect For The Dead
FOX
*Holding a dead bird out the window*
“Taste the wind one last time, bird spirit.”
Related: Comedy Is Finally Getting Respect (Is That A Good Thing?)
Bobby’s Christmas Gift
“Cool, a nightgown! I’m gonna wear this when I get older.”
Related: 3 Things That Make A Christmas Movie, A Christmas Movie
Bobby’s Career Dreams
FOX
Bobby: “I could be a golf course drink girl.”
*Bobby sets down 2 sodas*
Bobby: “Is there anything else I can get you gentlemen?”
Peggy: “Bobby, don’t let your father see you do that, honey.”
Related: 6 Insane True Stories Of Famous Things Invented In Dreams
Bobby’s Southern Roots
FOX
(With a Louisiana southern drawl.)
“Well, I need a window seat because this flower is wilting.”
Related: Mysterious Monolith Spotted In Southern Utah Wilderness
Bobby’s Idea Of Celebration
FOX
“This is a cause for celebration! I’m staying up till eleven!”
Related: 6 Common Ideas You Had No Idea Celebrities Actually Owned
Bobby’s Romantic Ways
“Let’s not spoil the moment with a lot of talk.”
Bobby has always been a romantic at heart.
Related: 5 Romantic Ways To Get Revenge on That Special Someone
Bobby’s Romance Interruption
FOX
Bobby and Peggy both scream after she walks in on him making out with a mannequin. Peggy should be happy that Bobby is finally settling down.
Related: Everything Is Gaming: Romancing NPCs Based On Their Love Languages
Bobby’s Delicate Body
FOX
“111 degrees? Phoenix can’t really be that hot can it?”
*Bobby hops out of the car*
“Oh my God it’s like standing on the sun!”
Flashbacks occur of when I only packed black jeans for a summer trip to Vegas.
Related: 5 Sneaky Ways The Modern World Is Destroying Your Body
Bobby’s Dancing
FOX
“Dad, look, it worked! We’re dancing!”
Who knew Bobby could throw that thing back with such ferocity! O.K. Bobby, I see you!
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Top Image: FOX
Related: The Ultimate Dance-Off: 'Flashdance,' 'Footloose,' or 'Dirty Dancing'
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