The third episode of Disney+'s Hawkeye spent like 30 seconds making fun of the character's classic comic book costume, a joke superhero adaptations have been doing for 21 years now but which still works, because ... well, look at this thing.

Hawkeye Diseny+ screencap - Hawkeye Had Size-Changing Powers For Years (And An Even Worse Look)

Marvel Studios

Laugh, but Kate drew feet which already puts her ahead of Rob Liefeld.

That's pretty goofy right there, even for a team with two other characters sporting wings of varying sizes on their heads. And yet, it's not even close to the worst thing Hawkeye has worn in the comics. Feast your eyes on the suit Clint Barton adopted during the time he called himself "Goliath," which made him look like a porn actor from the year 3000:

Hawkeye Goliath costume - Hawkeye Had Size-Changing Powers For Years (And An Even Worse Look)

Marvel Comics

The industrial strength girdle implies he's also a fan of shawarma in the comics. 

Oh, yeah: he could grow into a giant at that point, too. It all started on Avengers #63 (1969), when the bowstring on Hawkeye's bow snaps during a crucial point in a mission, rendering him completely useless (unless he starts walking up to enemies and pricking them with pointy sticks). Tired of being the Ringo of the team, Clint steals Ant-Man's growth serum and a new costume that Ant-Man's wife had prepared for him. For private use, we're guessing.

Hawkeye comic panel - Hawkeye Had Size-Changing Powers For Years (And An Even Worse Look)

Marvel Comics

Hawkeye Goliath costume - Hawkeye Had Size-Changing Powers For Years (And An Even Worse Look)

Marvel Comics

Hope he washed it first. 

Please note that he says, "These threads won't win any prizes," and then continues wearing for three more years. He even broke his bow in front of all the other Avengers to make it clear that he was completely done with that Robin Hood crap. There were some, uh ... growing pains, though.

Hawkeye Goliath costume - Hawkeye Had Size-Changing Powers For Years (And An Even Worse Look)

Marvel Comics

Isn't that the desired effect of a "growth serum"? 

But, as usually happens with this type of medication, the serum lost effectiveness over time -- Clint began "shriveling up like a carrot" right in the middle of doing the deed (the good deed of fighting for justice as a superhero, that is).

Hawkeye awful comic costume - Hawkeye Had Size-Changing Powers For Years (And An Even Worse Look)

Marvel Comics

Next panel is a big "SPLURT" (from him hitting the sidewalk, that is). 

It was a pretty sad sight. And so, in Avengers #98, Clint buys himself a new bow and goes back to his old Hawkeye persona ... with some adjustments. Apparently, he liked the extra ventilation of the Goliath costume because he started wearing an even more revealing getup with a deep v-neck and a skirt:

Marvel Comics

CLINT: "And don't worry, I'm wearing underwear under this." ANT-MAN: "He's lying." 

On the one hand, hahahaha. But on the other, it's actually kinda refreshing to see a male hero being forced to wear a skimpy suit seemingly designed to maximize sideboob angles, for once. And this happened in the early '70s! Once again, Marvel's commitment to progressive values shows through. Here's hoping Jeremy Renner gets to wear this beauty before his show ends, especially because there's a high probability this was the only reason he signed up for the role back in 2010.

Follow Maxwell Yezpitelok's heroic effort to read and comment on every '90s Superman comic at Superman86to99.tumblr.com. 

Top image: Marvel Comics 

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