Kevin Smith's Fictional Garbage Restaurant is Now Real

Daring the internet to make snide comments about reheating stale products that should have been discarded years ago, Jay and Silent Bob Reboot director Kevin Smith is getting into the fast-food business. In order to raise money for No Us Without You, a "fundraiser that provides food for families of undocumented restaurant workers during the COVID-19 pandemic" Smith's fictional burger chain Mooby's will be delivering food throughout Los Angeles.

Instead of magically piercing the barrier between reality and cinema by importing the food directly through the screen, using some kind of Last Action Hero-type golden ticket, Smith has partnered with the people behind pop-up recreations of the artery-clogging eateries from Good Burger and Saved by the Bell. Which is great, except for the fact that Mooby's always seemed like a real shithole in the movies. If we go by Clerks 2, Mooby's cuisine isn't exactly appetizing ...

Kevin Smith's Fictional Garbage Restaurant is Now RealView Askew Productions

Kevin Smith's Fictional Garbage Restaurant is Now RealView Askew Productions

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And even Arby's wouldn't stoop to hosting live donkey sex shows after-hours ... we're pretty sure.

Kevin Smith's Fictional Garbage Restaurant is Now RealView Askew Productions

Then there's the grim origin of Mooby's; the company first appeared in 1999's Dogma, Smith's controversial religious satire. Mooby is introduced as a "false idol" -- a literal golden calf owned by an evil corporation made-up of morally-bankrupt crooks and perverts who are swiftly murdered by avenging angels Matt Damon and Ben Affleck.

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So even though it's canonically gross, and run by child molesters, go ahead and order some Mooby's, because in real life the money is going to charity. If this works out, maybe we'll get more fictional restaurants helping out in this crazy time. We could totally go for a Big Kahuna Burger, followed by coffee and cherry pie from Twin Peaks' Double R Diner. Or what was that fake taco restaurant in Demolition Man? Man, that place looked classy.

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