In gaming, the indefinite delay of the Game Developers Conference could put indie developers in financial peril, as instead of striking a crucial funding deal they're suddenly trying to claw back their hotel and flight costs. Nintendo is struggling to meet demand for the Switch thanks to component shortages, and Sony and Microsoft might have to push back the release dates for their new consoles. Developers who outsource some of their work to China will probably face delays too, because while the gaming industry will happily work people to death they draw the line at making it that literal. And yes, there are certainly worse fates in an outbreak than having to wait for your new video game console, but why even dodge death if you can't play Halo Infinite?
There's Been Endless Toilet Paper Drama
Australians are hoarding toilet paper even though they absolutely don't need to, as Australia makes most of its own toilet paper and the Red Cross is already on emergency TP standby. This information did not prevent a 50-year-old man from assaulting a department store employee, a customer, and a cop during a "stoush," which we think is Australian for a bout of toilet paper madness. A different argument over toilet paper led to a knife being pulled, although that's pretty much how most Australian arguments end. Some stores have had to enact quotas or hire security guards, manufacturers are working 24/7, and the country's health minister has appealed for calm. But perhaps a little concern is understandable given that a semi-truck carrying toilet paper caught fire in the middle of the road like a harbinger of the bathroom apocalypse.
"Everybody get under something sturdy; we're gonna start airdropping bidets."
America is also seeing runs on toilet paper, Japanese shops and restaurants have secured their toilet paper with bike locks to prevent rampant theft, and in Hong Kong three men robbed a delivery truck at knifepoint for just $130 worth of toilet paper. But all this news is bumming us out, so let's end on an upbeat note. Back in Japan, a woman offered to split her local store's last pack of toilet paper with another customer. They got to talking, and they soon agreed to go out on a date, because the greatest virus of all is love.
Mark is on Twitter and wrote a book.