Jon Stewart Vomits Up A Slug, Takes A Syringe To The Eye
Before Jon Stewart began hosting The Daily Show to provide half your Facebook friends with endless clips to post in lieu of forming their own opinions, he was enjoying a fine but unremarkable acting and writing career. And as part of the "take what you can get" phase of his life, he wields precisely none of his comedic talent in 1998's The Faculty, about aliens attempting to conquer the planet by, uh, possessing the bodies of teachers at a random Ohio high school. It's kind of a slow-burn conquest.
Stewart plays a science teacher, and he has a rough time. First he's bitten by a mysterious creature discovered by a young Elijah Wood, and then Wood accuses him of being possessed by an alien. Instead of saying that sounds moronic and assigning Wood remedial homework, he immediately admits it and attacks half a dozen students with his newfound super strength. The fight leads to his fingers getting cut off with a paper cutter, which cause tendrils to come out of the stumps.
Miramax Films"Fools! You've only enhanced my finger-banging abilities!"
Then he starts barfing up an alien slug, as you do ...
Miramax Films"Oh Jon, you got a little thing there on your mouth. Yeah, just right there."
... but he's interrupted by taking a syringe to the eye.
Miramax FilmsWhich is like the fourth-worst place for a syringe to go.
He's initially able to shrug the syringe off, because alien ...