Aren't you glad you read all of this?
Splatoon Takes Place After The Apocalypse
Splatoon is Nintendo's take on first-person shooters, which means the guns use paint instead of bullets, and instead of merely trying to survive in the grimmest war mankind will ever see, all you want to do is settle the old "Mayo or ketchup?" Debate. You fight in colorful, good-natured battles between teams of hip little squid-people called Inklings, and the whole experience from top to bottom is very cool, fun, and heartwarming.
NintendoMostly because you're not the one who has to clean up afterwards.
And if you collect the Sunken Scrolls hidden across the single-player campaign, you'll slowly piece together that Inkling civilization is built on the all-but-forgotten remains of humanity.
The first big reveal is that Splatoon takes place 12,000 years in the future, after rising sea levels have killed off all terrestrial life. The Inklings have found at least one human skeleton, but all they know is that it's "a creature." They assume it was primitive and unintelligent, and hey, if we let climate change kill us, maybe they're right.
Nintendo"This is a hoax. I can see a Wii U. Nobody owned that crap."
Oh, and don't go thinking this new civilization is perfect either. In the absence of humanity, squid and other marine life evolved into more intelligent species that took over what little land remained. A century before Splatoon takes place, the Inklings fought the Octarians in the Great Turf Wars. The Inklings won, and the Octarians were forced to live in Octo Valley, an underground ghetto. That's why the game's main multiplayer mode is called Turf Wars -- you're implicitly celebrating a war that forced an entire species onto brutal reservations.
So basically every Nintendo game is in truth about genocide. Yes, even Animal Crossing. Especially Animal Crossing.
Abraham is your friendly neighborhood Mexican writer, living in Mexico and a fan of chocolate atole. You can say hi to him on Twitter here, visit his DeviantArt here, or read him on Quora here.
We know you're smart already and just having the best time building and crafting, but guides for Animal Crossing Pocket Camp are available for the best iteration of that game.
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