Let's do some math -- poop math. In Skull Island, Kong is 100 feet tall. Given that the maximum average height and weight of a male gorilla is 6.6 feet and 550 pounds, that gives Kong a weight of 8,250 pounds. The biggest gorillas also consume 8,000 calories a day, so scaling that figure gives us a daily caloric intake of 120,000, taken mostly from fruit and plants (notoriously difficult foodstuffs to digest). The end result of all this, and you'll have to pardon the expression, is a shitload of waste ... which he'll then need to gobble up immediately after, in order to get a do-over on any nutrients that he missed the first time. We've probably said it before, but Mother Nature is a freak.
Warner Bros. Pictures
And while we're at it: Who the f**k is cleaning up after the dragons in Game Of Thrones? If they're anything like Komodo dragons -- and they totally are, because a) those are the largest species of lizard in the world, and b) we just said so -- those fire-breathing monsters would consume about 80 percent of their body weight in a single sitting. In terms of backend output, scale that up according to how much those dragons weigh (there's no official figure, but this guy estimated it at 5,700 pounds.) and times the figure by three, and voila! You've found out what the worst job in Westeros is: Chief Poop Scooper to the Mother of Dragons.