Luckily, just as you release water vapor into the air when you breathe, so too do plants. And when you're thirsty enough to fantasize about slurping that watery stuff that gathers at the top of a fresh bottle of mustard, you're probably thirsty enough to consider drinking plant sweat. All you need to harvest it is a plastic bag, something to tie it up with, and an ordinary stone.
Tie the plastic bag around some leaves ...
... put something heavy, like a rock, in the bag to create a reservoir at the bottom ...
... and wait for the magic to happen. It's going to take a while, so you're free to engage in fun outdoor activities, like Hunger Games and crying. But after 24 hours or so, you should have between a cup and a quart of fresh water, depending on conditions. Don't worry, it tastes much better than your own sweat.
You can tell from the guy's face.
Blair wrote a short story for Carnisnora, his friend's excellent book of animal illustrations, and you can get yourself a copy here.
Think Nana and Pop-Pop's loving 60-year monogamous relationship is quaint and old-fashioned? First off, sorry for that disturbing image, but we've got some news for you: The monogamous sexual relationship is actually brand-new, relative to how long humans have been around. Secondly, it's about to get worse from here: monkey sex. On this month's live podcast, Jack O'Brien and Cracked staffers Michael Swaim and Teresa Lee welcome Dr. Christopher Ryan, podcaster and author of Sex at Dawn, onto the show for a lively Valentine's Day discussion of love, sex, why our genitals are where they are, and why we're more like chimps and bonobos than you think. Get your tickets here!
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