The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (7/26)

Trying to keep up with the news is like trying to assemble a jigsaw puzzle with half the pieces gone and the rest coated in sewage. No reasonable person can be expected to keep up with every headline while maintaining their sanity. So we have taken it upon ourselves to quickly summarize the most important and/or ridiculous news stories from the last week (or so).