The news often reads like the third movie in a superhero franchise -- the one that always has way too many villains and subplots. No reasonable person can be expected to keep up with every headline while maintaining their sanity, so we have taken it upon ourselves to quickly summarize the most important and/or ridiculous news stories from the last week (or so).
Source: ABC News
Bawitdaba, pass the green beans.
It's hard out there for millionaire purveyors of garbage pizza.