In Connecticut, a man tried to flee the scene of a crash on a bike, only to ride it straight into the side of a police cruiser, because he was a s****y driver on any mode of transport.
But ground escapes are for amateurs -- the high-rollers glide along the waterways of the world. Criminals frequently try to escape the authorities on boats, no doubt inspired by the gondola gangs of Venice. Drug traffickers are into speedboat getaways, Miami Vice-style. Back in 2000, three Florida coke smugglers hauled boat-ass past Marina police before parking at a sea wall and making a run for it through a subdivision. Two of them got away, probably by buying a house in the neighborhood. It was Florida before the mortgage crisis, after all.
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"Don't worry, the cops won't chase us. They've got a weekend coming up at our timeshare and they do not want to lose it."
Criminals in northern climates, on the other hand, prefer a slower pace. One pair of fugitives in Vermont were caught trying to get away in a rowboat, and north of the border, a man was caught red-canoed trying to paddle away from a robbery. "They were almost too cute to arrest," said a delighted officer, probably.
But none of these crimes can hold a candle to a gang of diamond thieves who took aquatic getaways to another level.
The most adorably insane level ever.