So is it just a coincidence that murder rates have gone down while coffee sales have gone up?
But feel free to use that argument in your commercials, Starbucks. Quote us as your source; everybody will take you super seriously.
Textures Dictate Your Assessment of Other People
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Your hangover is rough -- it feels like your gray matter is being dragged beneath a Buick with shitty suspension down a patch of unpaved road. And your boss is such a hard-ass -- he won't shut up about somebody puking in the paper tray. Luckily, Gary from Accounting is a soft touch -- a little sob story about chemo or something, and he'll happily take the fall for you.
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"Upon reflection, I'm beginning to think I might not be suited to office life."
When study participants were asked to complete a puzzle that was either rough or smooth, and then listen to two people having a conversation, the former group found the conversation to be more uncoordinated and harsh -- rougher, so to speak. Which is an interesting effect, but who the hell does puzzles anymore? So researchers conducted a subsequent study in which people haggled over the price of a car while sitting on chairs that were either hard or soft. Not only did the people on the hard chairs see their opponents as more stable, but they were also less flexible in their negotiations. If you walk into a car dealership and they have nice, comfy chairs for the customers, you're going to need them, because you're about to get reamed.
"Since this car comes with a new tailpipe, hopefully you won't mind me annihilating your current one."
Somebody hands you a clipboard full of resumes, and asks you to judge the first candidate objectively. Finally, a moderate amount of power with which to go mad! You plan to do your evaluations based solely on how stupid you think their name sounds -- a really objective assessment. And yet the weight of that clipboard might throw your careful decision making process into total disarray. Researchers found that people who were handed heavier clipboards tended to rate their candidates as both more qualified and more serious about obtaining the position, as opposed to those handed the same resume on a lighter clipboard.
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"I chiseled mine on a discount tombstone. They made me CEO."
Having trouble finding a job in this economy? Just tape your resume to a brick and chuck it through your potential employer's window. Tell 'em Science sent you.
For more ways we don't understand our own language, check out 5 Words That Used to Mean the Exact Opposite and 6 Everyday Words With Disturbing Alternate Meanings.
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