Castlevania II's Magic Tornado (and World Full of Liars)
After killing Dracula in Castlevania, Simon Belmont spends the sequel collecting five of Sir Vlad's body parts in order to resurrect and kill him again. Because if it's worth killing somebody, it's worth overkilling them. After grabbing his heart, rib, eye, and ring, you find that you're still lacking his grimy, yellowing toenail -- the most important ingredient in any resurrection. But the path is blocked by a physics-defying body of water:
He should just sing his way through the lake, since logic clearly isn't a thing.
So you have to walk around a bit and speak to the townsfolk, who, in just about every other game in existence, offer helpful hints that guide the hero to his goal. This time, however, you're greeted by 99 percent pure bullshit:
You'd get better hints from Cleverbot.
Yep, the people of Transylvania, perhaps aware that a whip-wielding, organ-stealing psychopath is roaming the land, continually lie right to your face. There are no potions, no crooked trader, nobody meets you at the river, and Luke blew up the Death Star years ago. Don't just blame Engrish -- series producer Koji Igarashi admitted years later that virtually everybody in the game is a "deliberate liar." Not that the game ever tells you this. Even the few characters with helpful information fuck with you while dispensing it, like the guy who tells you how to access the toenail dungeon: