Stress fucks up everything -- it plays a role in heart disease, mental illness, obesity, you name it. It's also something that modern society seems to have no answer for, other than to shrug and say, "Maybe if we legalized weed?" So it's no surprise that people around the world are looking a little outside the box for answers. Way outside.
That's how you wind up with stress relief treatments like ...
Aiju Chinese Massage
We understand if you think this treatment's only crime is being incredibly badass. But we would argue that nobody who has had their grease-soaked hands set alight by a barbecue has ever let out a relieved sigh and thought, "Oh, that's better." Yet that's exactly what some alternative medicine practitioners in China are toting when they apply huo liao, or "fire treatment."
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Porno for pyros.
Basically, the therapist throws an herb-soaked rag on you, pours alcohol over it, and sets you alight, sending you on a one-way trip to relaxation town. All the while, seasoned professionals are keeping a careful watch in case you go up like a Buddhist monk. Again, you know you've got an awesome stress regimen going when it requires somebody to hover over you with a fire extinguisher.
Supposedly, fire treatments help not only with stress and depression, but also indigestion, infertility, and cancer, despite all medical sourcing for those claims originating directly out of an ancestor's rectal canal. Still, we do think it might be worth the fee just to get a photo of you on Facebook with a Ghost Rider dick.
Fire crotch: it's not just for gingers anymore.