And then you find out about something you've not yet tried: losing weight through hCG hormone injections.
Congratulations, you have just won the gold medal in Wrong Olympics! If you'd bothered to Google around a bit before plunging that syringe in, you'd have found that the hCG hormone -- the one now flowing in your veins -- is attained from a very specific source:
Namely, the piss of pregnant women.
A small, sad percentage of you are ordering right now.
While the idea of hCG as a weight loss drug has been around since the 1950s, author Kevin Trudeau was the guy to take this pee rocket to the moon with his best-selling book, The Weight Loss Cure "They" Don't Want You to Know About. The book, by the way, was the latest installment in a line of self help health books that had so far taught us how to rip a new one to diseases such as cancer, herpes, AIDS, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, attention deficit disorder and muscular dystrophy.
Now, there's a few things you should know about Kevin. 1) the man is telling you to syringe piss in your body, and 2) he is a convicted felon with a criminal record the length of your arm who has no medical training or proof of his claims whatsoever. Three, he looks like this:
We might buy drugs from this man, but definitely not medicine.
Kevin's little scam didn't make him a millionaire, it made him a goddamn BILLIONAIRE and paved the way for countless hacks peddling hCG as a valid obesity cure. Which it's not, by the way. At the same time practitioners are injecting wee-wee into their thighs, they're also subsisting on 500 calories a day. So yeah, they're losing weight, but it's because they're officially anorexic, not because of the lady lemonade flowing through their veins.
Pauli Poisuo is a freelance writer, visit his humble virtual home here.
And since you aren't going to exercise, you might as well check out our bestselling book.
For more on health bullshit, check out 7 Random Objects Sold as Exercise Machines and 8 Health Foods That Are Bad For Your Health.