CURRENT BASE OF OPERATIONS
The San Fernando Valley
MTV' Road Rules: Australia
and the FX show Hitchhiker Chronicles
, a hidden camera show where I picked up and interviewed actual, live hitchhikers. Which, for the most part was really fun"Â¦
"Â¦until I had to choke one of them! Here' what happened: Creepy stinky hitchhiker sits in my car and says, "You were on Road Rules.
I've jerked off to you a million times." Then he lunges at me to kiss me. I choke him. The producers drag him out of my car. What I don't get is how he' too broke to own a
, yet can afford cable? Where the hell did he watch Road Rules
? In a homeless shelter? And what the f**k is the homeless shelter doing with cable TV? I can't even afford cable TV.
Also look for me in the upcoming Jackass
movie and TV the Movie,
voicing a slutty cartoon stripper.
June 2001, at the Comedy Store in LA. That day, I spent six minutes on stage and about five hours in the bathroom. I rushed through my crappy material just trying not to forget the jokes I'd over-rehearsed. I remember thinking, "How long will I feel this incompetent at stand up?" The correct answer: three years.