What company on earth is going to foot a $600 bill so some guy can watch episodes of Heroes on the bus? Follow-up question: Do they have any openings for comedy writers?
VERDICT: NOT SUCK It's Apple. They make great products.
Apple has earned a reputation for making products that are easy to use. The Macintosh invented the concept of "usability" almost a decade before Microsoft stole it and made it unusable. The iPod took a problem nobody realized they had (having a shitload of music) and made it simple and straightforward to not only carry it around with you but manage easily.
Apple's rolling off the biggest success in their history and the history of consumer electronics. They can't fail now, can they?
VERDICT: SUCK It's Apple. They make horrible products.
Sure the Mac and the iPod have been pretty successful, but has Apple ever made any bad products?
||Here's the Newton that we mentioned previously. This was Apple's PDA that didn't work, weighed as much as an Eastern-bloc car, and was released five years before anyone realized they needed a PDA.
||And here's the QuickTake. This was the digital camera that was released before most people had computers. Capable of storing up to eight photos, the QuickTake had a maximum resolution of 640x480 pixels.
||You remember the Pippin, of course. You don't? That was the home video game system released against the PlayStation and Nintendo64 in 1995. Sadly, it failed to catch on with the youth of yesteryear, due to the trivial facts that it was expensive, slow, had a stupid name and nobody made games for it.
||The Macintosh Portable was the "portable Macintosh" released in 1989 (portable meaning it had a handle). This 785-pound behemoth cost $6,500 dollars, which according to the Cracked inflation calculator, means it cost roughly $25 billion dollars in 2007 currency.
Price: $25 billion (2007 dollars)
The point we're trying to make is that for every success that Apple's had, they've also had a colossal failure. Or three. These failed products all have a few things in common. They were incredibly advanced for their time, often anticipating markets years before they developed. They were eye-wateringly expensive. And they didn't work.
We think it's extremely likely that 10 years from now, we'll all be using cell phones that look a lot like the iPhone. The trend toward electronic devices converging is as obvious as it is inevitable.
But, if you'll allow us to put on our prognosticating hats and look forward to the year 2017, it's very likely that these future phones won't be iPhones. For one thing, they'll only be $200, or free on a two-year contract. Plus, they'll be made by Samsung, Motorola or some Korean upstart. The iPhone will have crashed out of the market-maybe because of its price, or maybe because it never worked quite right. Apple itself will have gone out of business in 2015, after an enormous space-giraffe passing through our galaxy abruptly decided to lay an egg atop Apple's Cupertino headquarters, killing all inside.
Admittedly, we're not the most gifted futurists, so that might not all come to pass.