Tch...Hillary's up on the bar again. Hillary who used to find me very sexy and like it when I made love to her...I mean what is she doing? What is she doing up there? She doesn't even like to dance and she thinks her breasts are strange looking. Honestly, she kept her top on during our first week of lovemaking because she thought that her breasts sagged. Now she's showing them to 47 people because she was asked by a guy with a megaphone who, you know, who looks like a spider monkey with a sunburn?
I mean I don't even find this sexy. I mean not even really sexy at all. Tch, she must be drunk, or, or maybe it's the sun. Our parents told us that the sun was good for us and look what it does...I feel like I came to the Kentucky Derby with Catherine the Great."
Recommended For Your Pleasure
The flow of time is cruel to us all.
- By Mark Hill
- April 12, 2019
Some particularly obsessed fans sacrifice huge amounts of time and effort to come up with answers so we can all sleep a little better at night.
- By Zanandi Botes
- April 09, 2019
Lots of people forgot these movie moments ... but, like, how?
- By JM McNab
- April 11, 2019
Rarely does an Easter egg shatter your hold on reality ... but these just might.
- By Adam Wears
- April 08, 2019