Dressed in fine silk pajamas, these dwarves use miniature scissors to ever-so-gently trim each strand of pubic hair one at a time. The results are truly spectacular. The pubic clippings are then collected and woven into the finest thread and fabric known to man. Some of that thread is used in my father's expensively tailored suits. Soon, you too can experience the luxury that is Trump pubic hair. We will be coming out with a full line of products using the pubic thread, including the new
Our friend Regis was visiting with us the other day and saw my mother, Melania Knauss Trump's, vagina and let me tell you that even he was impressed. The vagina boasts 9-inch raised ceilings and a remarkable seven crystal chandeliers located throughout. The walls of the womb are accented with gold leaf and capped with a dome featuring a modern-day recreation of Michelangelo's sublime painting of creation that adorns the Sistine Chapel, with my father, Donald J. Trump, substituted as God.
The natural fragrance of my mother's womb is like the perfect mix of lilac and jasmine. Now you too can smell Melania Knauss Trump's vagina when the new Trump perfume,