8 Tiny Things That Stopped Suicides
There are stories every day about some rescuer heroically stopping a suicide attempt -- breaking down a door, scooping someone off a ledge or cutting a noose down with a ninja star. But sometimes there's no strapping fireman or hero cop or friendly ninja, just one little silly thing between life and death.
Something like ...
#8.
A Kiss
The 16-year-old Chinese boy in this story was having a pretty shitty time. His mother was dead and he was convinced his stepmother hated him, probably because she stole all his dad's money and left the two of them homeless and scrambling to stay alive.
So he decided to jump off a bridge. The police came, and hundreds of onlookers gathered to watch the show and not try to help at all. Then Liu Wenxiu, a 19-year-old waitress passing by, saw what was going on.
She was a quick thinker and got past the cops by making up a story on the spot about how she was his girlfriend and this suicide was over her. She didn't try to talk the boy out of it, but just listened to his story and then showed him her scarred right wrist, which got his attention. Then she told him her story about her equally shitty home life, and her own suicide attempts. "He had to be saved," she said later, "because I've been there before and I knew exactly how it was."
From What's On Xiamen
"Look at me," she told him. "I've been there and I'm now here." Then, knowing every 16-year-old boy's kryptonite, she gave him a hug and kissed him.
From What's On Xiamen
In this state, he was more than willing to let the cops take away the knife he was wielding and haul him to safety.
From What's On Xiamen
Later, they exchanged phone numbers and she promised to call him and check on how he was doing. Though they probably didn't hook up due to their age difference, he may have realized that killing himself would have taken away his future, which very possibly might contain sex. Oh yeah, and probably he also realized how he wasn't alone and other people knew what it was like. But also sex.
Now if your take-away from this story is that you can threaten suicide in the hopes of getting a girl to kiss you, that's clearly one possibility. But for every Liu Wenxiu, there's one of these impatient assholes that will actually help push you off the bridge.
From MSNBC.comDon't worry, he survived.
Are you a gambling man?
#7.
A Sarah McLachlan Song
So DMC, or Darrell McDaniels, of Run DMC, was at the top of his game in 1997, on tour in Europe, when he fell into an "Is this all there is?" funk. You people who have sold multi-platinum albums or purchased Greek islands know what I'm talking about. It wasn't just a mild feeling of something missing either -- he'd actually decided to commit suicide when he got home.
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You young kids do not even START asking who Run DMC was. Look it up.
As he was being driven home from the airport, Sarah McLachlan's song "Angel" started playing on the radio. Yes, the song that manipulates you into helping abused kittens and puppies. Anyway, they didn't have that commercial in 1997, so DMC wasn't thinking about how he should adopt a dog, but how life was worth living after all.
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Although the two concepts aren't completely unrelated, as you'll see in entry #1.
He put away his suicide plans and just started listening to a whole lot of Sarah McLachlan. A while later, he found out he himself was adopted, and finally life made sense for him. His adoption had put him in the right place at the right time to meet Run and Jam Master Jay and form Run DMC and resurrect Aerosmith by recording "Walk This Way" with them and all that business. And the point of this remarkable destiny, DMC decided (other than helping Aerosmith), was for him to use his street cred to promote adoption and help foster kids.
As part of that mission, he asked Sarah McLachlan to record a "Cat's In The Cradle" cover with him, telling her the whole story of how her music changed his life. Turned out she was also adopted. Hell, maybe that's why she wants people to adopt cats and dogs.
So instead of killing himself, now DMC is helping foster kids and listening to a lot of Sarah McLachlan music.
Anyway, something to think about next time you make fun of a friend for listening to music "for pussies."
#6.
A Firing Pin
Now I don't know a lot about guns, and gun parts, but I gather that the "firing pin" is a part of the gun that makes the gun fire. This is important, because when Joe Sanders, a soldier worn down from the stress of fighting in Iraq and the recent news that his wife was leaving him, put his M-4 carbine to his chin and pulled the trigger, the firing pin was missing.
Public Domain via Wikimedia Commons
I couldn't pick it out. Also I'm pretty sure this is the wrong gun.
His roommate, Albert Godding, walked in and found Sanders panicking, asking where his firing pin was. Godding asked him exactly how he happened to discover it was missing, at which point Sanders put two and two together and broke down. Godding had heard his roommate talk about killing himself earlier that day and quietly removed the pin.
I'm not sure what Godding's plan was for if Sanders didn't try to kill himself before he went back on patrol or whatever, but the point is that instead of dying, Sanders went to see the army counselor, got a lot better and is engaged again.
Apparently it's a big problem for a lot of soldiers to ask for help, since as manly men, they should just be able to rip a truck in half whenever they're down, and feel better. That's probably why Godding felt like he had to do the pin trick, since just asking his friend to open up about his feelings probably wouldn't have worked.
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"What's wrong, buddy? I just want us to share about feelings. That's your favorite thing, right?"
But not everybody knows where a firing pin on a gun is, so I think it's a good idea for manly men to try to ask for help. At the very least, it will save your family from breaking your gun when they are trying to find the firing pin.
#5.
A Massive Pile of Garbage
Apparently, last winter there was a huge snowstorm in New York, leaving conditions so shitty that nobody could pick up garbage. Bags of garbage started to pile up on the curbs and all the Febreze in the world couldn't do a thing about it. Serves them right for living in a place where it snows, is what I say. Sensible people prefer to take the risk of half their state falling into the ocean.
By USGS, via Wikimedia Commons
Wheeeeeee!
Anyway, hard-luck story Vangelis Kapatos, dealing with a nervous breakdown and facing eviction, jumped from his ninth story apartment and happened to land right in one of those massive piles of garbage, saving his life. Keep in mind this was still a nine-story fall. He was taken to the hospital in critical condition -- but still, he was alive.
It's nice to know that after hearing the story, the city's papers were able to find just the tone needed for such a bleak, tragic story of human suffering.
CapitalNewYork.com
All class.
I thought I would pass on the news that Don Richie, the Australian, passed away yesterday aged 86. A true unsung hero who helped many in their most desperate hour. R.I.P.
ReplyThat is too bad. I think the real heroes of the world mostly go unnoticed.
the world is less one good person.. :(
I had a cat who was really antisocial and barely visited me, but when I felt down and went to my bed to cry, the cat would walk slowly to my room from wherever she was, climb the bed and start massaging and purring. Nobody else noticed that I was feeling down but the cat. So I think animals have so kind of sixth sense that tells them when their owner is feeling depressed. I think that dog knew what he was doing.
ReplyWonderful, touching, amazing, and very true. Those who have been there know it. Thank you, Christina H., for this one, which is the best of all of your excellent articles!
ReplyThumbs up if today's article, '6 Nobodies Who Turned Into Superheroes without Warning,' brought you here!
ReplyThumbs down. Go back to YouTube.
Don't vote TheLosah down; it's inherently idiotic to ask for thumbs up. If you want thumbs up, say something funny, not 'haha gimme thumbs.'
One of my favourite Cracked articles. It's just damn inspiring. My cynicism stands no chance in the face of these entries
ReplyThis article really hits home with me. I've been suicidal for most of my life, and I'm only as of recently beginning to tear down the wall, and it really is the little things that count, like someone being there at just the right moment, even when they don't know it. Granted, you can't rely on those little things in life to just pop up. I mean, I have, but I've been incredibly lucky. If at all possible, see a psychologist, because for all of the naysayers out there, some of those guys really know what they're doing.
ReplyThe first Cracked article that had me in tears, but not from laughter... >_
ReplyThis is so touching...
ReplyA puppy, licking the ear of a veteran.
ReplyAnd stopping a suicide.
Animals can sense when you're not feeling right.
I couldn't commit suicide. What would my cats do?
Excellent article. It IS the little things that make a difference.
This is amazing, thank you :) the world needs more people like you :)
ReplyVery touching article. I've struggled with suicidal thoughts myself. I'd also like to say, if anyone needs me to wear a fruit hat? I'll do that for you random internet person!
ReplyHey, asshole. You giving the thumbs down. f**k you. Get a life. These comments funny to you?
ReplyWhat amazing men, dedicating their lives to saving the lives of others! Sometimes it's easy to lose hope, but with two men like that out there (and of course, puppies)... it's a reminder that there is good in the world. I know my cats saved me from suicide...
ReplyThanks for this article, Christina
Christ. I've read this a fair few times, and the f*****g puppy makes me tear up every goddamn time. Probably because I've got bad brain chemistry and love animals. Knowing something that cute and helpless is depending on you is a huge motive to not off yourself.
ReplyI was severely depressed from ages 13-17; i made plans to kill myself countless times, and attempted twice at age 17. The first one was a weak attempt-i didn't really know what i was doing-but the second one had me minutes away from death when i was found, and put me in the hospital for 3 days. I was finally diagnosed with depression and an anxiety disorder and got the help i needed. It's still very hard; but when i think about the men at #2, my faith in humanity gets restored, and when i think of #1, i am reminded of the small things that make life worth living.
ReplyI read this every time I think about suicide, thank you christina, I owe you more than you could ever know. It's been a rough few years and this site has been one of the few bright spots, I've read this article so many times and I still shed manly tears.
ReplyHang in there, dude. You're worth it.
Definitely hang in there! Life can suck but there will always be so many great things that will happen if only given the chance.
"On days when you just want to watch the world burn, remember that for every d******d in the world bullying gay teenagers there is a guy like this." I actually cried. Thank you so much, Christina, for reminding me that there is good in the world.
ReplyJust a pointer, theres another article about suicide on this site and a lot of people in the comments seem, well, suicidal. I think they need the same kind of internet help. Please, take a visit to the comments section over there and try to help some people out. By the way, just a fantastic article.
ReplyThe Ten Minute Suicide Guide by David Wong. By the way, whatever happened to him? He hasn't written an article in ages, which is unfortunate because he's a fantastic columnist.
He hasn't written much because he's been put into Jay Pinkerton's former position as Cracked's Editor-in-chief, which takes up a lot of his time. I'm glad for him, although it's a bit of a shame since I absolutely love all of his articles.
"The point is that a person is driven to suicide by a whole bunch of different things, which build a wall around them, piece by piece, until the last piece falls into place and the wall is sealed so that there's no way out. Sometimes we look at all the problems that build up someone's wall of hopelessness and think there's no way any of the insignificant things we could do would be able to take it all down. But to break the illusion of there being no way out, you don't need to take down the whole wall, you just need to make one crack in it. One puppy lick, one phone call from Laila Ali, one corny song, one Internet stranger, one old Australian guy asking if you want to come in for a cup of tea."
Reply"Just one ray of light."
"And one crack in that wall might be all it takes to turn things around and begin the long, tough job of tearing the whole thing down."
That...was the most beautiful words I've ever seen on the internet. I'm not ashamed to admit that I, as a man, shed a little tear.
Christina H, you are awesome for writing this excellent article.
This article made me weepy, but I swear the puppy story made me start sobbing.
Replyagreed. I have an adopted dog who has gotten me through some horrible times. Before I adopted her, she was abused, neglected, and finally her original owner tried to kill her by suffocating her in a plastic bag. That dog is scared shitless of everyone and everything, as she oughta be after a life like that. When I first adopted her, she wouldn't even be in the same room with me. It took NINE MONTHS but one day I was sitting on the couch and she strolled up and plonked herself on my lap like it wasn't no thang. I gasped, and immediately burst into tears. It just made me think, if she can go through so much trauma and still be happy to see me when I come home, life is f*****g amazing. And even now, years later, every time she sits on my lap or climbs on me while I'm sleeping, I think that all over again. (sometimes along with "dammit dog, I'm sleeping, stop poking me in the face.")
Dammit, ruckumbine, I made it through the whole article without crying. :') That's a really touching story. Thank you.