5 Ridiculous Secrets Only Two Living People Know: Part 2
We've already told you that some of the best-guarded secrets in the world can be for the most ridiculous things, but it turns out there are a lot more of those than we originally thought. Here are five more things you will never learn in your lifetime -- unless you happen to be one of the only two people on the planet who already know them.
#5. The Meaning of the Led Zeppelin Symbols
What Is It?
Quick: What's the name of the fourth Led Zeppelin album? Led Zeppelin IV? ZoSo? Girls, Girls, Girls? No, no, and shame on you. The "title" is actually a bunch of weird signs. This is one of the best-selling albums of all time, containing classics like Black Dog, Rock and Roll and Stairway to Heaven, and only two people in the world know what the title really means (one of whom has apparently forgotten it).
Dina Regine
He could have written it down, but noooo. Groupies.
You see, in 1971 Led Zeppelin decided to release an album without any text or markings of any kind on the LP cover, which only depicted a cryptic image of an old man carrying a bundle of sticks. It would be lazy of us to attribute this decision to drugs but, OK, yeah, that's probably it. In lieu of a name, Atlantic Records asked the press to refer to the record as a series of four metaphysical symbols, even distributing graphics in various sizes that they could use:
Wikipedia
"And now let's hear 'Stairway to Heaven' from, uh ... let's say, the Rolling Stones."
Each symbol was selected by one of the four band members to represent himself. Robert Plant, John Paul Jones and John Bonham have been upfront about the meanings of their respective symbols: the two in the middle come from The Book of Signs, and the one with the feather was created by Plant to represent the fabled lost continent of Mu. Bonham's mystical avatar is also rumored to be inspired by the Ballantine beer logo, because apparently the man was known to enjoy a drink or two every now and then (he's dead now).
Wikipedia
Forty shots of vodka can do that.
But the first one, the one that looks like it says "ZoSo," was designed by guitarist Jimmy Page ... and no one knows what the fuck it means. Well, almost no one.
Who Knows?
Jimmy Page himself and (maybe) Robert Plant.
Getty
That's a big "maybe."
How It Is Kept Secret:
Simple -- by consistently refusing to explain what it means for 40 years. The symbol has become a kind of stand-in for the fourth album's title and is also indicative of Led Zeppelin as a whole -- it continued to be used by the band during subsequent tours and in promotional art, while most of the rest did not. It's also the only one that looks like someone spent more than 15 seconds thinking it up.
"Jimmy, hurry up. Robert's so bored he's just parked his car in a tree."
What makes this extra mysterious is that Page is known for being pretty well-versed in arcane knowledge: he was (and possibly still is) a huge collector of occult paraphernalia and a devout follower of the works of Aleister Crowley. According to one theory, the symbol was derived from a 16th-century arcane glyph representing planet Saturn:
inthelight
You have to squint.
As for what it means in terms of Jimmy Page, the only person he's ever told is bandmate Robert Plant. Plant was so shocked by the revelation that he went ahead and forgot all about it. In his own words: "You may not believe this, but Pagey once took me aside and said 'Look, I'm going to tell you the meaning of this once, and then I shan't ever mention it again--or at least, not for a long, long time anyway.' And would you believe that I have since forgotten what it was, and now Pagey won't tell me."
The closest we've gotten to a straight answer was the time the two were doing an interview for an Australian TV show and an audience member interrupted them to ask about the symbol. Plant, who may or may not have forgotten the real answer at that point, jumped in and replied "It means frying tonight." We'll probably have to wait 40 more years to figure out what in the hell that means.
Getty
But expect to see "Led Zep's Whole Lotta Bacon" any day now.
#4. The Results of the Academy Awards
What Is It?
As much as we've mocked the Oscars in the past, we still think it's pretty impressive that, even in this era of phone-hacking tabloids and sleazy celebrity gossip websites, the Oscar winners have never, ever leaked out before the actual ceremony. In 83 years. Neither have the Golden Globe winners, but that's slightly less impressive because no one cares about them.
inquisitr
Run along now, we're talking about grown-up stuff.
After all, the Academy Awards ceremony is one the most-viewed television events every year, and each year bookies all over the world take huge bets on the winners -- even Vegas is considering getting in on the action on an official, legal basis. That's how good the security is on this thing. That's all thanks to PricewaterhouseCoopers accountants, who handle all of the ballots on behalf of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences.
zimbio
Accountants apparently being the only people who can count in Hollywood.
Who Knows?
Brad Oltmanns and Rick Rosas, accountants at PricewaterhouseCoopers.
How It Is Kept Secret:
First of all, each ballot is counted and the results tabulated totally by hand. Each year, these two men know who will win in all 24 categories approximately 48 hours before the ceremony because they counted it their damn selves.
overthinkingit
This means they got to say "Marisa Tomei? Really?" before anyone else in the world.
Each ballot also includes an electronic control number, so that if a ballot is lost or stolen, that control number is immediately stricken and a replacement sent out. Other than that, though, nothing is computerized; the main reason they've never been hacked is simply that there's nothing to hack. The two accountants use good old pen and paper to sort through the ballots sent in by the members of the Academy, which are marked in pencil, pen or, in at least one case, crayon.
Oh, and everything is counted in a windowless, secure room in a secret location. On the night of the Oscars, LAPD officers in tuxedos escort each man, via separate routes, to the ceremony. Each carries a suitcase containing half of the winning envelopes, presumably so that if one is hijacked or exploded by terrorists, at least they can go through with half the show and fill the rest of the air time with awkward comedy and dance numbers.
Getty
No one would really notice the difference.
Even after they're arrived at the theater, though, the accountants still aren't allowed to let the envelopes out of their sight. They have to literally stand at the edge of the stage all night, without bathroom breaks, personally passing out said envelopes to the presenters. Also, they have to memorize all the results in case of slip-ups or Kanye-esque outbursts.
All that for a stupid awards show. If the security at the Electoral College was half that good, chances are at least one of our presidents would have never been elected. You all know who we're talking about.
That's right, President Whiskers (1904-1908).
#3. The Ayapaneco Language
What Is It?
This isn't some secret nerd dialect created for a Star Trek fan fiction -- the Ayapaneco language has been used in Mexico since before there was a Mexico. It survived the Spanish invasion and was a "vibrant" tongue in the Tabasco area as recently as 50 years ago. Then Spanish became mandatory in schools, and locals started moving away. Ayapaneco, like many other native Mexican dialects, began dying out simply out of apathy.
Getty
There's just no decent swear words, which is all you ever need to learn anyway.
Over the years, attempts to teach Ayapaneco to a new generation have failed after free classes proved seriously uninteresting to anyone with access to any other hobbies. While there are a handful of people left who understand some words and phrases, by now there are only two fluent Ayapaneco speakers on the entire planet.
Getty
Or a heck of a lot less than there are fluent Klingon speakers.
Who Knows?
Manuel Segovia and Isidro Velazquez.
How It Is Kept Secret:
In this case, it's actually the opposite: an anthropological team is actively attempting to save the language by compiling a dictionary. Researchers are scrambling to compile as complete a vocabulary as fast they possibly can before the language dies out -- literally, since the two remaining speakers are now 69 and 75 years old. Obviously the most logical way to do this would be to sit Manuel and Isidro down together and let them shoot the shit for a while.
The only problem? They refuse to speak to each other.
sallyhanreck
It turns out "suck my dick" is a very complicated phrase in Ayapaneco.
Despite being only six years apart in age and living less than a mile apart in the same village, the men won't talk. So what happened? Did one of them sleep with the other's wife? Was there some sort of complex political and/or soccer-related disagreement we can't begin to comprehend? Actually, it looks like they simply don't care for each other very much. That's the whole reason.
The Guardian
"He has a mole on his forehead that I find awkward to look at."
One researcher explained that "they don't have a lot in common" (being the only two people in the planet who can speak a rare language doesn't amount to much), and apparently the two men think this is a good enough reason to let a huge part of their culture die. So that's two things they have in common: an ancient, nearly extinct tongue and irrational stubbornness. And it's not a case of not giving a fuck about their roots, by the way: Manuel actually tried teaching the language himself years ago, but class attendance was low.
Getty
"I shouldn't have scheduled classes during 'Must-See TV'."
Another language, Ter Sami, is also spoken by only two elderly people in Russia, but at least we can blame the Soviets for that one.
2704. 27 minus 4 is 23. The person in the second vid chose 23. Definite use of subliminal persuasion there.
ReplyUntil you realize that subliminal persuasion is bullshit.
They're ILLUSIONS, Michael.
ReplyI'd very much like to be in your Prostate-ticular.
Magicians are gross.
Replyaccording to wikipedia: There was no indication of a title or a band name on the original cover, as the band disdained being labelled as "hyped" and "overrated" by the music press, and in response wanted to prove that the music could sell itself by giving no indication of who they were.
ReplyI figured out half of the card trick. Now to figure out the other half...
ReplyYou can hand a random person a deck of cards? You are my new god.
That napkin fold is pants, Google origami Bahamut or ancient dragon...now that shits impressive! Also the Batmobile isn't origami, just papercraft. Jeez.
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesIsn't Origami technically papercraft?
@StewitusP.Johnnyknocker: It's not origami if you cut the paper or use glue, etc.
I'm prolly being to picky, but you can cut the paper to a BASE shape. Limited to regular, tho. Like squares, rectangles, the occasional triangle...
Suddenly I wish I had cloth napkins to try working #2 out with, since I imagine paper ones are too flimsy to work. It looks like the hardest part would be keeping the base section neat and crisp-cornered.
ReplyIf you google Zoso you'll find some stories about a malevolent Ouija board entity.
ReplyPretty sure the led zepplin thing is a symbol for a planet or something, looks familer to somthing I saw in a astronmomy book.
Reply...Ha!
That is mentioned in the article.
Jupiter, perhaps? I swore that I read that somewhere... Oh wait, it was in the article.
Regarding the card trick video, I agree with one of the comments below that the person holding the cards is an accomplice. In the second demonstration, the guy looks like he places a palmed card on top of the deck in his hand right before showing it.
ReplyThe one thing I noticed about the card trick, is that he doesn't allow anyone to sort the deck. Seems critical.
ReplyIt wouldn't matter it's not that their just in the right order that the number in the deck and the card match up (do it 57 times and it'll happen, or if you have enough accomplices.), it's the fact that it happens every time, seemingly with no accomplices.
My guess is it uses some sort of mathematics, to narrow it down to the point where it will almost certainly happen, it probably goes something like this.
starting with a 1 in 57 chance of getting it right (he mentions it's actually 57 X 57 (2,000+) but I don't think it is, since it's not a consecutive guess, e.g. I want you to think of two numbers and two cards)
1) Most people will pick a number between one and ten because they encounter those numbers more often, lowering the chance of getting it wrong.
2) When he splays out the cards he memorises them, so he knows the order they are in, this will work with any complete deck, as long as it has no joker or rule cards in it, which is also why he doesn't allow anyone to sort through it. Since he knows the order now as long as he asks them to make their choices first he can flip the deck upside down to make the right one come up.
3) When he splays out the cards the other person will subconsciously read them automatically, however once again, they will only be able to get about 10 across because they cannot read moving unfamiliar symbols that are displayed briefly with much ease. This also means that the numberpicker will also now be more subconciously likely to pick one of the first ten.
4) By using body language and suggestion to influence the decision that the marks make, this works better then you'd think, one magician successfully used this to figure out a unique mashup of songs made up on the spot by a DJ and then mimic the tune; he was likely picking up on small movements made in response to the rhythm (and prolly did prior research on the kind of music he plays/listen to, as well as basic knowledge about music).
5) He could get away with using a plant for any one of the three participants, without getting caught at least a couple of times, especially useful if the person who picks up the cards manages to palm one or two extra ones on top to align it properly.
All this together probably makes it certain that the trick will work, but on top of that, there are others things that can be done to make it look even more impossible to others and not merely chance.
1) Obviously concealing all the smoke and mirrors above.
2) Only using a plant on occasion, so that it's possible to pick people who were in the same group one night, and have a plant the next, avoiding suspicion.
3) Lying about the odds to make it seem more impossible.
4) Having three people to do the trick to make it seem like all three have to get it right, when in fact only one person does (the number-picker and card-picker only have to mutually match each other.)
5) Not doing it too regularly, often or in front of all that many people all that often to make it seem like he gets it right everytime.
6) Even if he screws it up once or twice, unless the crowd are all hardcore magic fans, or it's well known that he doesn't always get it right, then it will seem more improbable.
7) He can rely on the fact that it's an intricate clever trick and most audience members won't be able to figure it out and will be too enthralled at the time, to do so anyway, plus if he keeps doing it in disparate venues most won't even know who he is, and even if they do figure it out only roughly 1 in 3 people will actually tell anyone, and there's probably not that many people they can tell anyway.
So he's got quite a safety net, even if he does screw up.
"4) By using body language and suggestion to influence the decision that the marks make,"
Are you serious?
Please let me in on what body language controls people's minds and makes them pick a specific number. Go ahead, point it out in the video.
"It means frying tonight"
ReplyHaving lived through the 70s, I would take that to mean "doing acid tonight". Looking at Paige, who could argue that ;-)
Can we opt out of profanity in the article itself?
Replyf**k you p***y
I personally think that card tricks are the highest form of prestidigitation, ones that rely on slight of hand and subtle trickery rather than rigged props, or the use of a planted individual. Its just too easy for people to create and elaborate and fancy prop designed to make an impressive looking trick in today's society, and once you know what to look for it becomes a lot less interesting.
ReplyExplain to me why a language is a "ridiculous secret".
ReplyRidiculous out of the fact that it is a secret, I assume.
Because no one else on earth knows it?
the ZOSO symbol is a cartoon face. not a big deal.
ReplyHaha! the two only person left on earth, that speak the freaking language, don't speak to each other. Haha
ReplyMan, I laughed!
That's irony for you.
Haha! The two only persons left on earth that know the f*%$#% language, don't talk to each other! hahaha
ReplyMan, I laughed!
"Then Spanish became mandatory in schools, and locals started moving away. Ayapaneco, like many other native Mexican dialects, began dying out simply out of apathy."
ReplyTHAT'S rich.
The card trick: It's pretty amusing the savant like powers being ascribed to Michael Parkinson, Martine McCutcheon and Alastair McGowan. There is no way that Parky or Martine McCutcheon (best known at the moment for advertising yoghurt) have memorised a deck or a system of signals.
ReplyAnd the one holding the pack, Alastair, is an impressionist whose closest link to magic seems to be a role in Jonathan Creek.
The card choice was suggested beforehand I suspect and forced in the fan spread, the number range may have been suggested throughout the performance, but if neither suggestion worked, he'd have run with something else. Then the deck itself is stacked and bridged, and the trick could have played out any number of ways. Sometimes the effect would be impossible, as in these examples, sometimes not, sometimes he wouldn't have to touch the deck again, sometimes he would, guess which eventuality is uploaded more often.
Or maybe the cards are actually holographic sheets that project the individual cards onto themselves, but then he switches them around using some sort of thing with electricity in it so the right 'card' comes up.
Actually, it's more impressive to know that he's manipulating a normal deck of cards and/or the independent choices of two other people without them or the person holding the cards realising he's done it.