6 Death-Defying Stunts That Are Secretly Easy to Do
None of the below stunts requires magic or ancient mystical mastery of your body's inner energies. What they do require is lots of practice guided by someone who knows what the hell he's doing.
In other words, do not get drunk and try these just because this article explained how they're done. You can totally kill yourself if you do them wrong. Seriously.

As the name may indicate, sword swallowing is basically when a performer shoves a blade down his gullet, sometimes deep enough to enter the stomach and scramble undigested Toaster Strudels. Anyone unfamiliar with the trick would have to assume that it's some kind of illusion, because it's pretty hard to believe that someone could jab at his innards with a goddamn sword without incurring some breathtakingly serious injury.

Don't belch.
The trick has been impressing crowds since Old Testament days; the stunt originated in India over 4000 years ago, making it one of the earliest and most impressive things to come out of the subcontinent.

Dhalsim notwithstanding.
So, they use a trick sword made out of taffy or something, right?
Nope, you can totally do it with a real sword. As it turns out, the only trick to deep-throating a sword is overcoming your gag reflex. When something enters our esophagus, it contracts to push it down toward the stomach. This reaction occurs automatically, whether we are downing a burger and fries or 22 inches of forged steel.

"I think I see the problem right here."
Problems tend to arise when your esophagus contracts around the latter, so the entire trick to sword swallowing is to slowly (usually over a few years) train yourself to control your gag reflex. If stopping an automatic reflex sounds impossible, just ask any contact lens wearer. The first time you try to touch your eyeball with your finger, your eyelids reflexively slam shut. But after a few months of inserting contacts every morning, you get to where you can jab you finger right in there without so much as a twitch. It's just a matter of concentration plus repetition.
So once you've gotten control of your gag reflex, it's just a matter of tilting your head back at a 90-degree angle (so that your GI tract is straightened out), and then you've got a more or less straight path for the blade (or whatever) to slip down your throat. You do have to do it slowly -- your GI tract still isn't perfectly straight so you're kind of using the sword to gently nudge your internal organs out of the way.

AGAIN: DO NOT ACTUALLY DO THIS.
Needless to say, the swords used in this trick are usually dull, unless the performer has a death wish. Of course, performers do try to top one another, doing things like using multiple swords, which as you may imagine is fantastically dangerous. Particularly when you get to the whole "shifting internal organs" part of the trick.

The only thing missing here is one giant sword for America.

Fire eating has been a favorite at freak shows and circuses for centuries, as well as by drunken frat guys looking to impress girls at a party just moments before a screaming trip to the emergency room.

But once again, it's all in the technique, and understanding something about physics.
The trick begins when the performer dips a specialized torch into fuel and lights it. He then takes a broad stance and tilts his head back at a 90-degree angle (which you'll remember was also the first step to sword swallowing, but it's done here for a different reason).
The picture up there tells the story. Heat rises and fire goes up -- that's why you can hold your fingers on either side of a candle but put a finger right over the flame and you'll be in tears. Likewise, the flame coming off the end of the torch wants nothing more than to burn your face into Eric Stoltz from Mask, but you can safely get it into your mouth if you give the heat a perfect, vertical, invisible chimney to rise up out of.
But if the angle is wrong, God help you.
While lowering the flame, the performer also needs to slowly exhale in a steady stream. This is another strategy to keep the heat of the flame away from the face by blowing it up and away, but there is another, much more crucial reason:
If the performer inhales, the fire is going to get sucked right into his lungs and roast his insides.

Imagine this guy's stomach lining in a microwave. Nobody wants that.
If everything has been done up to this point without a burntacular injury, the fire has finally made its way into the performer's mouth. Then he closes his lips around the flame without touching them to the neck of the torch -- at this point the torch is red-hot and would melt his lips together like a soldering iron -- and with one last, quick exhale he can extinguish the fire.

Human flesh is fragile and easily damaged, so how is it that some people can hurl their hands and arms at stacks of wood boards and concrete blocks and make them look like they're made out of Styrofoam? Hell, even children can do it.

"TRY TAKING MY XBOX NOW, MOM."
Well, as it turns out, block breaking has less to do with strength and more to do with knowing the physics behind this feat.

It's a well-known scientific fact that breaking bricks makes you look suspiciously like Gary Busey.
See, every time you see this trick done, the blocks are suspended by dividers on either side that hold up the very edges of the blocks or boards. This part is crucial and is the reason why karate masters aren't tearing apart skyscrapers and sidewalks with their bare hands. For the blocks to break, there must be enough space beneath them for them to bend.
All materials flex and bend to some degree when impacted, even cement. That's part of what makes something a good building material; you want it to give a little. It's this small but important flex made by the blocks that allows you to break them.
As Bruce Lee -- or rather, the people who fought Bruce Lee -- can tell you, the karate chop is one of the most efficient movements the human body can do, exerting thousands of newtons of force. If you hit the blocks in the exact middle and -- this part is important -- then follow through with a pushing motion to complete the chop, it prevents the blocks from rebounding from that bend. So the break hinges on this critical follow-through.

This is why you won't (necessarily) shatter every bone in your hand by trying to chop through concrete. But just to be clear: The technique is everything. This still shouldn't be attempted by anyone who hasn't been trained professionally unless you're not planning on using your hand for the rest of the year.

The nurse will not be impressed.








Well, I kinda just skimmed the article, but I saw the phrases "safe" and "try this at home" a lot, so here we go!
ReplyYou missed so many opportunities with the sword swallowing.
ReplyHah! I see what you did there! It's dicks, right? I mean, it has to be dicks.
We learned about the bed-of-nails trick in Physics I in high school and watched a Hewitt video on it. It was pretty crazy--in the video, the professor laid a student down on a bed of nails, put a wooden board on him, put a bunch of concrete on THAT, and then smashed the hammer on the board. The guy got up unscathed.
ReplyThough according to my teacher, another time that professor did that trick, the guy got up all bloody because something went wrong, so, y'know, the professor stopped doing it after that.
actually even though they add spacers between the boards and bricks it still requires a lot of force to break through them they have showed that it requires over 900lbs of force to break through 13 plus bricks
ReplyThese were actually a lot more complicated than I had originally thought.
ReplyI am now going to walk across a bed of nails covered with hot coals while simultaneously swallowing a sword and a flaming torch, all the while breaking planks lined up in my path! It will be an epic weekend! Thanks Cracked for the great activity suggestions!
ReplyPS. If I am really drunk will it make me burn faster? Or will the numbing effects of the booze cancel out the extra pain, effectively making it a wash?
Test it out on your local homeless person, they're 70% Jameson and 30% sadness.
I thought there would be expert commentary from the sword swallowing department.
Replyi once did the bed of nails thing. it was actually pretty comfy.
ReplyThe first sentence made me laugh so hard. Toaster Strudels. Oh my.
ReplyI can break one board, but that's it. (I took Tae Kwon Do when I was in elementary school.)
Replyi always cringed thinking "what if the sword swallower fell over with the sword in his mouth?"
Reply2 other simple ones:
Reply1. Walking on broken glass. Very simple, only need 2 things, make sure the glass is broken up into mostly small pieces, no big jagged chunks, and have enough that you can make the bed of glass an inch or two deep. Thousands of tiny pieces all pushing against each other effectively cushions your feet and distributes your weight in a similar way to the bed of nails trick. Like the nails, if you take just one piece of glass and step on it, it'll stab into you foot. A million and you're fine.
2. Breaking cinder blocks on someone's chest with a sledge hammer. Even easier. Take a standard cinder block and set it in someone chest. Take a standard sledge hammer and smash it. As long as thy don't have that bone disease from Unbreakable (and you don't miss the cinder block with the sledge) they'll be fine. This works because the cinder block breaks. When the block breaks it absorbs pretty much all the energy of the blow in the process and almost nothing is transferred to what it's resting on. If you used something that wouldn't disintegrate from a hammer blow, like say a steel block, you would end up with a lot of broken ribs and internal bleeding. More or less the same as you would expect to see from hitting someone with a sledge and nothing in between.
Seriously though, DO NOT TRY THESE AT HOME EITHER!
My science teacher did the cinder block trick with an anvil. He also swung bowling balls at us, created working Tesla coils, and lit of rocket fuel in the classroom. Walking in there any given day was like exploring a temple in Indiana Jones. 7th grade science kicked ass.
When you are well focused....I dunno really, but your hands and foot can really do amusing things.
ReplyBut you forgot to mention the repetition on martial arts, leads to microfractures in the bones that make them more hard when they heal.
About the fire eating stuff...I have seen it, and it looked like f*****g hurt when goes wrong.(Guy only eated cereals for a month)
But when done properly..is just awesome.(And for the spitting fire...well, a liter of milk after that, and your brain will be fine)
I seem to remember from martial arts training that the mental preparation involes thinking through the piece of wood (or brick. Never tried that one. I'm not quite that masochistic), so you're trying to hit a point about a foot below the object. If you try to just hit the object itself, you sort of stop short and hurt the hell out of your hand. Some of the rest of this stuff on the list takes some mega-balls though. I mean, sword swallowing?
ReplyI loved the bit about Fire Eating, I always wondered how that worked.
ReplyI'm a fire eater and I always try teaching and telling people it's way easier and less impressive than they think but fear completely takes over and they'll hold the torch like 5 inches from they're face and freak out. I would say the biggest obstacle to fire eating is just getting over the fear. side note, it's pretty bad for your teeth. like, I'm 21 and will probably have dentures in my 40s.
You should tell them the trick is showing everyone their tits.
Ive actually laid down on a bed of nails before. Its not comfortable, but its not painful either. And yea, its about weight distribution.
Replydid anyone else notice the that the kid laying on the bed of nails was a little girl, but the caption says "He's in time out." lol
Replycould go either way. baggy ass jeans, and really young. braids can be unisex too
@IEatBabies Not with a ponytail of braids and pink flowers on a green shirt in that cut. ... The things you notice when shopping for children
Its not easy, it was only explained how but it still remain to be hard and needs some hard balls. Except the bed of nails thing, that one is really easy
Reply"...and then you've got a more or less straight path for the blade (or whatever) to slip down your throat."
ReplyD'ohohoho. Whatever indeed.
got your point.
@ a.Jamess
I see what you did there.
Once again the mysteries of life are taken away.
Reply