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Turn Your Retarded Videos Into Cash With Cracked.com
How would you like to be a famous millionaire? Well, too bad. You'll need to move to Hollywood, take a series of expensive acting classes, and probably get some elective surgery at some point. On the other hand, if you'd like to become Internet famous, and make a smaller amount of money, Cracked.com may just be the answer. Cracked, a humor website that exists mostly as a tax write-off for a large corporation, is already famous for paying random people off the Internet to write articles, which are mostly lists about Batman. But, the eccentric CEO of Cracked (who chooses to live full time in a heavily-armed helicopter "because he can") has demanded that Cracked branch out.
The site had been a disaster, sure, but his desire was to make the site a much bigger disaster (of "orphanage fire proportions" according to a recent memo). Cracked decided to plunge headlong into 2004 and do with video what it has done with text. Which is, take submissions from crazy people and buy the ones we like. We started taking submissions in late November and within days, nearly 100 videos had been submitted, such as this heartfelt tribute to Hitler: ... And this parody of The Others, only it's about cows so they called it The Udders: Now, incredibly, Cracked is looking for videos of even higher quality than that. If that sounds like a challenge, that's because it is. Are you funny? Have funny friends? Got a camera? Or, maybe just some rudimentary animation skills? Want your video to be seen by tens or hundreds of thousands of people? And, be paid money? And, to have dozens of commenters call you fat? Click here and read the instructions. But be warned, the other submitters have set the standard pretty high.
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15 Comments
I eat developmentally disabled children for strength and wisdom. I respect them very much.
I treat crack as a friend. with the implicit suggestion that inflicted people are funny and to be mocked. I got the same opinion with one of my friends on a site called pubspa. We shared many interesting videos and games. Also All are free
retad
i find gladstone to be retarded and disturbing.
I'm thinking it makes sense that someone who can't distinguish sarcasm would think a picture was funny merely because the person in it had developmental disabilities.
Lockett
Wetspot, I can't tell if you're being sarcstic or really are that snide. Your avatar is funny.
Lockett
Wetspot, I can't tell if you're being sarcstic or really are that snide. Your avatar is funny.
Spikedude
Guys. I am tough on the internet. Trust me. I'll make a video about it later.
Hey "Pal" (a.k.a. the Hulk), We are done celebrating Christmas here, and I didn't get my yellow 2008 Ferrari. Snide is all I got for another year...Pal.
Listen here answer for everything Superhero to the lame "Gladstone", I was using a Big Mac avatar when I was involved with that fuck pile of ass clowns. Now, with that said wheel your Handy Tard Gimp chair away from me, and go take up the best parking spots at WalMart using that tiny blue plastic placard with your picture on it... Merry Christmas!
Wetspot, maybe you were banned for using a picture of someone with disabilities as your avatar, with the implicit suggestion that inflicted people are funny and to be mocked.
...so, who else loves kittens? And babies?
Wetspot, it's Christmas. Don't you have family? Friends? Something to do with your time other than leave snide remarks on internet forums. Seriously? Well, Merry Christmas anyway pal.
Fuck Ptwot. I called a SENIOR member of that foul shit dump of a forum a "sweaty vagina" for acting like a pompous douche, and I was banned for life. Fuck SENIOR members of forums who are threatened by smarter, more witty newbies. So fuck off, I cannot view your rules concerning the submittal of videos to try and jump start this scab site on the arse of Ptwot... Fucking e-Nazis. Keep up the good work!
your fat
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Natasha
Killer Boob!! HA!