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Before American Idol came along, people relied on cable access television for their fix of second hand embarassment. With the only barrier for entry being an inexplicable belief that you deserved to be on TV, the no-budget broadcasting platforms drew a flood of some of the most bat-shit insane characters ever seen outside the gates of an asylum. Here are seven of the most terrifying, surreal and all together hilarious moments ever broadcast on cable access TV.
7
Sondra Prill - Nasty Boys
Why It Rules: While the borrowed fur (and the borrowed footage from another music video) help bring this clip to the brink of awesomeness, it's Sondra's complete dearth of talent that really gives it that extra push. Each awkward pelvic thrust, each attempt at a sexy come-hither look (which all come out looking more like demonic possession) put yet another nail into the no-talent coffin. Every time she screams "NASTY!" try to remember that she actually thought she was going to be a star. Every time she bugs her eyes out all crazy, try to remember that she probably thought it looked sexy. Remember this all, then listen to her lovely singing voice and die a little inside. As an added bonus, the dancer at 1:33 looks a lot like Val Kilmer in Real Genius, so it's got that going for it, too. See Also: |
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Oh, and that Spirit of Truth guy, is he reading out of a fuckin' phonebook? That's what it looks like.
The two videos I most wanted to see (the singing chick and the retard chef) are both no longer available. Now I hate you.
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that bald guy on the treadmill is seriously inspiring me to create and experiment, and possibly learn something from the process
Appeently goths don't like rehearsing either.
My favorite part of the spirit of truth: "I make my ass very available."
Think about it for a second.
Some are these are hard to believe if you didnt see them for yourself. Wish I could see the cheesy video from the first page but YouTube took it off.
Just do a search for his name. There are still several vids of him in action on YouTube, you just have to look a bit.
I was so excited about viewing the last video after that brilliant write up. and what do you know, let down again. f'n youtube cant do shit right these days.
Oh my Goth!
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"Speak Out" sounds like some kind of gay pride movement. Also-
"Please sir, there are Boy Scouts in the audience, you're scaring them."
"They should be."
Sure, all infomercials are goofy. But, some are just sad.
No, they're not all in jail.
Seriously, all you need is duct tape.
Does that lab coat come in a C-Cup?
What will fix the fuel crisis? Magic.
Diapers and milk. Anything else is excessive.
The entire internet is laughing at you! Now what?
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kaisharif
RIP Merrill! he died in June age 45. i'm glad to see he was doing something with his life and not sitting around on his ass reading insane blogs like the rest of us slobs. he was living his dream!