Pages Ripped From a North Korean Text Book
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bravo, my friend, brave.
ReplyA truly Great article
This is so wrong...
ReplyKilling Americans with money is NOT ironic, to be ironic is to use a word to mean it's opposite. You'd think Kim Jong-Il would read the definition of a word he invented.
You're wrong Toad. Irony has a much more complex definition than just "being the opposite". It basically means an occurrence that is unexpected or the opposite of what is expected. Since America is the most wealthy country in the world, it WOULD be ironic if it was destroyed by money.
Oh, my. How cavernous would a vagina have to be in order for him to "walk out"? I want to see someone beaten to death with live chickens, that s**t would be awesome!lol. Alas, if only this were real.
ReplyReading that he was six months premature, not really big.
i cant tell if this is real
ReplyIt's not... But the real stuff is hilarious in its own right, too.
Poe's Law....
Replyfor a second there, i thought this was real...
i think i gotta vote this as the most funniest s**t here, well done
ReplyThe last line is the most ironic thing I have ever read.
ReplyWelcome to America, eh?
I was going to say "Please tell me this is real" but I think I'd die a little on the inside when I found out it was. Or worse, saw what the schools are actually using.
ReplyNUCLEAR SLAUGHTER.
Replygod, communist dictatorships are hilarious.
The only reason we don't take them over is...what exactly? Seriously, it'd be so easy, and would probably popularize us for reuniting the Korean Republic! C'mon guys, let's get on this, invasion of Korea is at hand. Lest we forget Homefront.
Reply Hide All See All 6 RepliesI agree, this stuff needs to get started as soon as possible, I heard a story of a North Korean teacher who finally decided that everything was bullshit, so she escaped to South Korea, starving to death, she ate the first thing she could find (dog food) and she said it was the best thing she had ever tasted. The worst part is that 27 of her 28 pupils died. In that year alone.
Doesn't America have its fingers in enough pies already? Do we REALLY need to spend so much money and manpower to take down another government when we should be fixing our domestic issues first? At least wait until our economy and employment issues improve before flushing more money down the military toilet.
Also, America seems to under the impression that it is our job to police the world. Let one of the closer countries take the initiative this time and overthrow the North Korean regime. We are still trying to clean up our own mess in the Middle East.
Of course, what do I know? I am just some douche replying on an internet humor website's article comment that it over two months old.
China. China is the reason.
America already tried that once, see Korean War. A ground war with Asia would piss China off. They also have 100s of millions of troops at their disposal.
Best plan right now is probably to stand back and wait for the North Korean house-of-cards economy and Jenga-esque government to collapse in a spectacular yet disastrous plume of failure. Probably fewer people die, and it's one less war for the American government to take on. It's an inevitable disaster.
The majority of south koreans don't want to be re-unified. Who would want to take on a demented sibling in this frigid economy?
North Korea potassium is superior to all other countries potassium.
ReplyWhy is it in English?
ReplyTranslated so we Capitalist pigs know what we're missing.
Wait, this is an actual textbook? I thought it was just a Photoshop!
ReplyI definitely feel sorry for every North Korean in there. This is totally hogs**t! Seriously, that ain't even education! That's high-grade brainwashing. Do they even have access at least to Wikipedia there? Or maybe their Chairman has the only means.
ReplyYou realize this is parody, right?
While a parody, this isn't too far off from the brainwashing North Koreans actually get. Everything good that happens is the direct result of their divine leader's wondrous generosity. And no, they don't have access to Wikipedia; North Korea is probably closer to George Orwell's 1984 than any other country in history. Except *maybe* Stalin's.
Do you know that recently they said Khamenei recited religious slogans when he was being born?
Reply Hide All See All 5 RepliesThe dictatorships are not much different from their parodies.
Who's Khamenei?
He's the Assahola who founded the current Iranian regime.
I think. You can never tell because there are like half a dozen ways to spel his name and most of his successors had very similar names.
Actually, Khamenei is the current asshola. Previous one was Khomeini. And he has had only one successor.
Ass-hole-a?
(Come on, you had to have expected it)
He's the a*****e who was put in place by the US so they could keep the oil (Iran's Prime Minister wanted to nationalize the industry). Thank the CIA!
The c**kamamie and Demented States of America is just a magnificent name. CDSA #1!
ReplyIn Soviet Korea, Textbook teach YOU!
Reply Hide All See All 3 Replies.......so wait we normally teach text books?
bren93: that was exactly what i wanted to say!
Oh, no, in the US, textbook teaches the others, we are too smart for textbook.
Who the hell does Kim Jong il think of himself, Chuck Norris?
ReplyThe ranks of people in the world - by Kim Jong Il
#1 Kim Jong Il
#2 Micheal Jordan
#3 All Koreans that are not Kim Jong Il
#4 Everyone Else
#5 The USA
To tell the truth, I'm honestly not sure if Kim Jong Il is lying though. He could be crazy enough to believe everything he's saying is true.
well f**k my mouth, north korea is best korea.
ReplyAccording to the official North Korean textbooks, Kim Jong Il hit three hole-in-ones in his first golf game, and he has the phone number of every citizen of the country memorized. The second one might be believable, since I think Kim Jong Il is the only person in North Korea that actaully has a phone.
ReplyAs for the golf game, after the 3rd hole-in-one, the other 15 holes immediately sprang into action, filling themselves with his golf balls so that he wouldn't have to go to the trouble, because they recognized his superiority.