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For those of us who were asleep and/or drunk all through grammar school, a simile is a comparison of two things using "like" or "as," such as "Our public education was as pointless as an edible bicycle seat." CRACKED offers the following lesson in similes-and how not to use them-as a community service, because we wish to make up for these shameful failures of our education system, and because "community service" is the part of our plea bargain that keeps us out of jail. #12.
Goo Goo Dolls - "Iris"
Offending Lyric:
Maybe the Goo Goo Dolls confused the words "the movies" with "freshman and sophomore years of high school?" #11.
Def Leppard - "Pour Some Sugar On Me"
Offending Lyric:
Even for the late '80s, "radar phone" doesn't sound like such a hot piece of technology. Here, Warrant's girlfriends were probably all getting car phones, along with new Trans Ams in which to install them. To make matters worse, when Def Leppard's girlfriends tried to phone their boyfriends to complain about their crappy gifts, instead of connecting the call, the radar phones would just measure how fast Warrant's girlfriends were driving in their new cars. #10.
Culture Club - "Time"
Offending Lyric:
Other rejected lyrics from this song include "water is like a bucket in my knee," "bread is like a basket in my stomach," and "writing songs is like getting really high and playing a game of Operation." #9.
Poison - "Every Rose Has Its Thorn"
Offending Lyric:
The real problem is on the cowboy/sad song side of things. Forget "every" cowboy singing a sad song; we're having trouble thinking of one. Clint Eastwood? Anyone in Tombstone or Young Guns? There were probably no sad songs in any season of Deadwood simply because not many sad words rhyme with "cocksucker." So who's left? Michael Irvin? Wait a second ... does the fact that roses don't have thorns and that cowboys don't sing sad songs suddenly make this work as a simile again? Friends, I believe we have just been outwitted by Poison. #8.
Bob Seger - "Like A Rock"
Offending Lyric:
Needless to say, anyone betting on Seger's boulder to win the Kentucky Derby probably wound up tearing up their tickets in frustration before being wheeled back to the asylum. #7.
Ricky Martin - "She Bangs"
Offending Lyric:
We've searched the rest of the song for some kind of clarification. The chrous offers, "She bangs, she bangs/when she moves, she moves." Does this woman go clanging around in a medieval suit of armor? Does this also apply to "every girl in history?" How could such a virile, obviously not-gay man know so little about the nature of females? |
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"flying like a bird like NF," while horrible in its own right, is a functional simile, with "flying like a bird" taken as a whole. Although there's no subject to the whole damned clause anyway.
Re: Oops: Yeah, I totally feel like s**t for pointing this out.
Re: Oops:
The line is "when everything feels like the movies" and a simile is "a comparison of two things using 'like' or 'as,'". Thus the sentence is a simile (in the same way that "my dong feels like a massive iron rod" is a simile - and a lie, but that's neither here nor there), comparing how everything feels to "the movies", and the next line intimates that somehow bleeding to know that you're alive is something that the vocalist often does or feels like doing at the movies. Or he thinks that people often do in movies. Or something.
No argument with the "serious as a cancer" thing, but "rhythm is a dancer" is meant in the same sense as "this song is a real toe-tapper", i.e. "hey this rhythm really makes you wanna dance".
Friggin hilarious on the Alanis simile.
Can't believe i'm about to agree with someone who calls themselves "Studmuffin" (don't pretend anyone else does) but he's right. The Goo Goo Dolls reference isn't a simile. They are saying that everything feels unreal so they cut themselves to prove it's real. There is no comparison, no, as and no like. Your own description of a simile should have told you that.
Does anyone else feel like s**t because they feel the need to point out things like this on annonymous forums?
NOTHING TO DO WITH THE ARTICLE - WHICH WAS AWESOME: And you would assume, nathank111, (most likely, as the person MAY be a fan of The Faint) incorrectly. Danse Macabre was a Steven King book well before being a Faint album, and prior to that was a common metaphor for death and how EVERYONE dies. Thus the 'macabre' term.
That bit about the spoons in Alanis Morisette's song just made me cry, I was laughing so hard. f*****g hilarious!
ehhh the Goo Goo Dolls one actually makes sense because they were saying when things feel unreal but yeah all the other ones make no damn sense
hilarious.
I think the song is more of a reference to migratory birds.
Danse Macabre is an album by 'The Faint' ... I can only assume that's where he/she got it from
Paul Simon as a doorstop while his mother fed a chunk of granite...THAT, you bastards, was funny stuff.
the hell is with your name, mr macabre?
Nelly Furtado is saying she's like a bird because she'll only fly away. When you try to get close to a bird it flies away....and that's what she's saying she'd do if you tried to get close. Duh. She's not saying anything about a bird caring where it's soul is. Those are two different ideas, not 1.
No comment on the whole missing soul and home thing...
The Goo Goo Dolls werent specific enough. They meant movies about freshman and sophomore years of high school.
What about in "I love you like a fat
kid love cake" from 21 Questions? That's a pretty craptastic one.
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hey minty, what kind of music do you like? oh yeah (if you're old) you only believe in pink floyd and zepplin (if you're young) you only believe in hip-hop. f**k off you ignorant assholes know s**t all about music. (i'm not talking about the site or it's members, i'm talking about people who fall into these catagories)
A rock is steady. strong, at times unmovable. I grew up in the 602. Love me like a rock means his mothers love is always there; unconditional. Don't try to interpret a 60s songs when ya don't know what your talking about.
"Shake it like a Poloroid picture" isn't on here because it isn't a simile, it's an imperative statement. Simply because the worD "like " appears does not mean it is a simile. Nothing is being compared. Apparently attendance was an issue the day the was taught.
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I feel like chicken for dinner. Is that a simile, Auslander?