A Gentleman's Guide To Etiquette
A Gentleman understands that embezzlement, insider trading, tax fraud and similar activities are not actually “crimes.” “Crimes” are committed by poor people and involve guns.If arrested, a Gentleman does not make a scene. He smugly points out that his army of lawyers will make sure he never spends a minute in prison.
Once jailed, a Gentleman never insults a fellow inmate by refusing his sexual advances. If propositioned, a Gentleman gives an elegant bow and holds his posture until his superior is finished.
I laughed the second it got to the n***o section (I am black, by the way). Hilarious article.
Reply"It is tacky and bourgeois to use $100 bills" :D
Reply"A Gentleman tips a Negro three-fifths of what he would tip a White."
ReplyThe historical reference made the entire, otherwise unfunny article worth reading.
For the average reader, you should know that Back in the Day when the government had to decide if a slave would be counted as a person or not (The argument: they are people vs. they don't have rights), it was decided that they would be counted as 3/5 of a person.
Thank you, professor Bazel, you sir, are a gentleman and a scholar.
You are quite charitable for teaching such an unlearned mind such as my own the ways of history, and for showing once again that you are far superior than any "Average" reader on this site.
Dick.
Entirely unfunny.
ReplySir, you are no gentleman.
LIES!!! A gentleman never drinks Merlot on the same day he eats. that is below acceptable standards and requires stoning of the ingratful lunatic.
ReplyRather brutish behaviour for the mere execution of a commoner, don't you agree? I suggest a somewhat public hanging for the entertainment of proper gentlemen. Merlot will, of course, be served by the former widow, current maidservant.
Well, there IS such a thing as reverse discrimination, but people don't usually use the phrase correctly.
ReplyThis article was great, btw.
hahahahaahahahhahahahahahahahahaha and yeah hahahahahahhaha
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