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Got a new job? Got an existing job, but getting a lot of weird looks from coworkers? Cracked is here for you. We asked our readers to put together three-step guides for survival in the modern workplace.

Entry by

DO GET COFFEE WITH THE BOSS! DON'T INTERROGATE THEM FOR COMPANY SECRETS! NEVER AH BLAH BLAH BLAH BL LAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BU BLAH BILAH BLAH'BL BLAH BLAH

Entry by Karen Jones

CRACKED.COM DO offer to help customers when they get upset, but DON'T let them abuse you... and NEVER argue back. Call your supervisor instead.

Entry by Glydiot

OFFICE PARTIES DO: Keep it professional. DON'T: Drink too much. NeveR: Have sex on the copier.

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