I am a hard-working father of seven who spends all day watching videos on the internet of bands he liked in the 1980s but is too traumatized to admit it to close friends and family. The bands, not that he spends all day watching videos. They were mostly crap bands. But I liked them.

I also am addicted to onion rings. I mean, onions are pretty awesome? Virtually every recipe in the world has onions in, right? The only was to make them more awesome is to dip them in batter and deep fry them. Coat them will chili sauce and it's a taste-bud nirvana.

Strangely, I don't like Russian Dolls.

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