Cracked VS: Thanksgiving vs. Christmas

Cracked VS: Thanksgiving vs. Christmas

The end of the calendar year is absolutely PACKED with the best holidays, from Halloween, to Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years. It's like Tom Hanks' movie run in the ‘90s, just hit after hit. It would be unfair to judge a baller holiday like Christmas against, say, Arbor Day, so let’s make things even: what is the better cozy, end-of-the-year holiday where you stuff your face and make awkward small talk with family members you are 90% sure think the moon is fake and any sexual orientation other than their own is socialism? 

CRACKED VS FIGHTER PROFILES CRACKED.COM THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS Based around: Based around: Overspending Overeating Wants you to ask Wants you to be for free stuff thankful for what you have Best song: Eartha Best song: Monster Kitt tries to f*ck Mash, still bumping Santa from Halloween

CRACKED VS ORIGIN THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS CRACKED.COM Based on a birth Based on a that may or may white washed not have historical event happened, that may or may appropriating the not have really Pagan festival happened. Saturnalia.

CRACKED VS BIG COMPETITION THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS Tern fore BEWARE - BUTQUY Arou CRACKED.COM Halloween the New Years, just a month prior, which few days later, is more fun and celebrating the start of a brand doesn't necessitate eating mountains new year by of carbs at 2pm getting to first with your base and extended family. blacking out.

CRACKED VS CELEBRATED ON THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS CRACKED.COM Jesus' birthday! Always the 4th Well, not really, as Thursday in the celebration November, because was moved around the National Retail the mid 4th Dry Goods Association wanted century, and no one knows the to expand the actual day for sure. shopping season.

CRACKED VS ICONOGRAPHY THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS CRACKED.COM Pristinely wrapped Any pumpkins gifts are placed that survived Halloween get under a slowly dying Douglas Fir, to stay on the and neighbors front steps, and a bird the size of compete for the highest electric an 8 year old is bill. consumed.

CRACKED VS POPULAR ENTERTAINMENT THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS CRACKED COM After Halloween, Planes, Trains, America becomes and Automobiles Christmas Town, holds it down an enchanted while the less snow globe popular Dutch pumping Mariah waits in the Carrey and Elf wings. 24/7.

CRACKED VS FOOD THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS CRACKED.COM Photo SOUTH Selectively bred Honestly, replace turkeys with a body the Thanksgiving mass that would turkey with a ham and you basically make a body builder blush are get Christmas dinner. You can cooked in roast chestnuts over exponentially creative and a fire, but that sounds demented. dangerous ways.

CRACKED VS THE NIGHT BEFORE THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS CRACKED.COM Unofficial A holiday in its drinking night own right, your that packs the last chance to bars, a final get off the sendoff to naughty list by partying with not being such a your friends. little douche.

CRACKED VS THE DAY AFTER THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS JO280819 oure CRACKED.COM Continue to eat like Play with all your you only have 24 new toys and drag hours to live, the tree, now just fueling up to battle a stack of loose for a big screen TV that has an pine needles, to artificially inflated the curb. Why is price so that the this a tradition discount will look again? enticing.

CRACKED VS TV SPECIALS THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS MACY'S AR DE CRACKED.COM Why does Why does Aunt Debbie need to Grandpa insist on see Felix the putting on this Cat towering black and white movie where over some elementary every actor is school 100% dead at this marching band? point?

CRACKED VS CHILDHOOD TRADITIONS THANKSGIVING CHRISTMAS CRACKED COM Kowtowing to a Dressing up like magic lardass that pilgrims and Native Americans works one day a with hats and year and is headdresses made keeping tabs on from construction how often you paper, and doing masturbate. Also a themed word doing a themed search. word search.


Scroll down for the next article


Forgot Password?