24 Funny, Wild and Bizarre Crazy Roommate Stories

Cue the dancing lobsters!
24 Funny, Wild and Bizarre Crazy Roommate Stories

Most of us have a Crazy Roommate Story that we trot out at parties. Sharing a space with another human being opens up the possibilities for a wide range of experiences, and while it’s possible to luck out with the random stranger you find on Craigslist, there’s also the chance to meet (and live with) the most insane person you’ve ever met. To that end, here are some of the wildest stories Redditors have shared about cohabitation...

mitch_kramer 12y Freshman year of college, I walked back into my room, and my roommate is sitting on his bed, staring at the TV, watching Pokemon, with tears in his eyes. I didn't even say anything, I just looked at him, he wipes his tears and says, it's sad. ... 4
ProjectGSX 12y I had a roommate who robbed a bank. Не was a friend from high school. Super nice, very charismatic, but always seemed to be getting in trouble. Ended up getting kicked out of school. Не had a few odd jobs while he was living with me and occasionally paid rent. It wasnt a big deal as my parents were funding the place while I was in college. Anyways, he up and leaves one day and doesnt come back. A few months later I had moved into a new place. Не calls me at around 2am one night, saying
greentide008 . 12y During my sophomore year of college my weird-o roommate casually tells me that he's up for an internship with the CIA and that our phone would most likely be bugged. The college I went to had a pretty well known relationship with the agency and he was in the right program for that kind of shit. I moved out that week. ... 2
DrLandingStrip . 1y My roommate in college claimed he was involved with the mafia. Не was constantly sweaty, was very jumpy, and always had a lot of cash in his car. Не never was around on the weekends, and I never saw him drink. Strangest of all, is that he never once slept in his room. Не was always on the couch by the door. Не eventually told me that it was because if someone ever broke in looking for him, he wanted them to find him right away, so no one else would get hurt. I still don't know
smogeblot 12y I had a Ukrainian immigrant room mate who went completely psychotic after we introduced him to weed. Не stole a bunch of shit, left it in random places in the city. Не got kicked out of the Diesel store for rearranging all the shirts by color. Не claimed to meet 50 Cent in the street, and claimed that 50 Cent was going to pay him to clean his house; when in reality he had just broken into a black guy's car and taken a cleaning receipt out of it. I found him sitting on the top of the
karnim . 12y Only one real strange story for me. I had a pretty well-balanced roommate from what I could tell. Except one day, I returned to the dorm to find my roommate folding his laundry. Seems normal, except he only had a shirt on. No boxers, no socks, just a t- shirt. Standing around folding laundry. It was a bit weird. ... 31
mflood 12y Walked into my dorm to meet my roommate for the first time, and he was hunched over a laptop, wearing a tasseled winter hat, orange ski goggles, camo pants, no shirt, and a full length, forest green wool cloak. In August. Over the next semester, he constantly threatened to beat me up (our physical differences made this laughable, but he always seemed serious...), maintained a seriously creepy relationship with a tiny russian girl, and bragged to anyone who would listen that he had started a nerg nerg nerg internet meme. I have no idea if that last part
Brysamo . 12y CHEESE - My old housemates were interesting to say the least. One time they decided to fill an entire glass with bacardi 151 and light it on fire. In the middle of the living room. They all sat there watching it and then they started wondering if it would get hot enough for the glass the break. Well, sure enough, right after they say it aloud, the glass shatters, and flaming bacardi goes everywhere.
vespucci 12y I had a roommate who would sleep all the time. I mean every time I would walk into the room, he would be napping. If i ever woke him up in the middle of his nap or anything, he would sit up and introduce himself as Bob (not his real name) and then resume sleeping. The first time this happened I was just he was joking around or something, but when questioned him about it later, he couldn't remember anything that happened. So the next time he was asleep, I tried it again, and he was 'Bob' once
WarEagle09 . 12y I had a roommate freshman year who would dress up in a lobster costume (complete with claws) and hula dance around the room... no explanation. She was majoring in engineering, and would just stop studying suddenly and put on the lobster costume and start dancing. ... 515
Opposite_Lettuce 1y I'm pretty sure I used to live with a hobbit. -Man about 5'1, curly brown hair, constantly cheerful demeanor -Never wore shoes, inside or out -Literally slept on the floor in what can only be explained as a nest of blankets -Started a garden and encouraged me to eat his tomatoes all the time -Would bring home samosas and other goodies, always giving me half just because -Не and his wife had a dream of living off the grid in a tiny home on a truck I hope he's doing well ... 15.2k
SnooChocolates4588 . 1y Came home from my first day of classes to poop everywhere. Toilet seat, tile, bath mat, toilet paper holder, sink, carpet. Had a long discussion. Not acceptable. Happened again, took 6 weeks to get her out. ... 2.7k
Shadow948 . 1y My roommate once create a whole new lifeform by leaving beans in the fridge until they molded so bad they became pure white. Then she got mad when I threw it away because she was going to use it later. ... 7.1k
maruffin . 1y I taught a roommate how to boil water. Iced tea was the first thing, other than sandwiches and salads, that she had ever made. ... 2.6k
2leewhohot . 1 1y When he skipped out on rent, and moved while I was at work, he left behind some of the most interesting porn I've seen. Не was into amputees and urine.
DavyCroquet 1y My first ever roommate freshman year of college was one of the most impressive people I had ever met. Не had a great job that covered his cost of living and tuition (this is 2006), had his own place, was getting great grades in a tough program, and was with an amazing woman. I was super stoked when he offered to let me rent the 2nd room. Over the next year I watched all that fall apart due to a sudden and overwhelming WoW addiction. I can still remember the time when I was trying to get him
xpollydartonx . 1y I had a college roommate who was obsessed with CSI. She had a CSI pillow and sheets/blankets. She refused to turn on any lights and kept all blinds shut. She hated light and would sigh loudly if I would turn the lights on to do anything. I went to college right around when you needed a college email to make a Facebook, and she would tell me that Facebook is how they spy on you... she said she would never have a MySpace or anything of the like. (She might have been right on that one) and
Squigglepig52 1y I used to live with two strippers. Needless to say, they weren't early risers. One Sunday morning, we get a knock at the front door. Jehova's Witnesses. So, K goes to the door, and invites them in for coffee. While buck naked. к is pretty, ummm, impressive naked. built like Chyna in her prime, lots of tattoos and piercings. Needless to say, they left, quickly. And we never had missionaries at our door again. ... 2.8k
shellexyz 1y I lived in a dorm room with a guy for a year and never once saw him coming from or going to the shower. It was a communal shower, several stalls in one room that the whole floor shared, and while I don't expect him to climb in the shower with me, I would have thought that sometime during the nine months we lived together that I'd see him come back to the room with a towel or something. Clearly he was showering, I think after that long someone who didn't would be odoriferous enough for everyone to
Enough-Salamander919 . . 1y Не started watching me from dark corners of the house at night if I was in the common areas. Super fucking creepy Edit: I love how a creepy ass experience turned into something so cute hahahaha thanks reddit ... 879 ResponsibilityDue757 .1 1y I too have lived with a cat ... 1.5k
antwauhny . 1y I woke up around 5:30am and made my way to the kitchen, groggy and barely awake. As I turned the corner, I stopped in my tracks because my roommate of 3 months was crouched on the counter, wearing a speedo. In a Gollum voice, he said My precious!!! and mimicked Gollum's weird movements. I refused to react to it, said nothing, and made breakfast. It's been 10 years and we're still great friends. ... 316
notanaltaccount88 1y I moved in with a couple. She was VERY obviously pregnant but denied it. They had 7 pet rats, which I was chill with. Their bed was on the floor so the rats could sleep with them, cool. Whatever you're into, not for me to judge. The rat shit that was EVERYWHERE in the house was an issue. In the tub, in the wash machine, outside their room in their shoes. My final straw was when I baked 15 DOZEN butter tarts for Xmas gifts cuz I was a broke 20 year old and they ATE THEM ALL
codefyre 1y Had a roommate who like to project the whole alpha male vibe. Different girlfriend every weekend, always parading them through our apartment, lots of loud sex, constantly bragging about the quality of his sex life and how it made him a real man. After around six months of that, I was grocery shopping in a nearby store when I ran into one of his weekend flings. Apparently, she remembered my face but couldn't place me. So she just asked, Where do I know you from? Work? Are you a client? Nah, you dated my roommate. Which led to
 e 13 yr. ago I woke up one night to the sound of my roommate outside smashing the VCR he'd thrown out of his window with a sledgehammer while his girlfriend looked on in horror. It turns out Angela's Ashes had gotten jammed in the machine and he wasn't having it.
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