Dr. Pepper, Axl Rose and a Completely Unrelated Video: The Friday Nooner (EST)!
A Couple Of Things I spend a lot of time thinking about time machines. More specifically, I spend a lot of time thinking about what I would like to go back in time and witness firsthand if I had one. A bear-baiting event, Zeppelin live at Earls Court and the Boston Molasses Disaster all used to seem like obvious first stops, but after reading this headline this morning I'm not so sure anymore: Dr Pepper Will Give Everyone* in America a Free Soda If Axl Rose Releases New Guns N' Roses Album, Chinese Democracy, In 2008 (*Guitarists Slash and Buckethead Will Not Be Eligible For Free Soda) Fuck bear-baiting, fuck molasses, and fuck the greatest rock concerts of the 20th century 1 - I'd rather go back in time two months, hide behind a coat rack in a conference room at Dr. Pepper corporate headquarters, and listen in on what must have been the most hilariously misguided marketing department meeting of all time. According to the press release:
"It took a little patience to perfect Dr Pepper’s special mix of 23 ingredients, which our fans have come to know and love,” said Jaxie Alt, director of marketing for Dr Pepper. “So we completely understand and empathize with Axl's quest for perfection – for something more than the average album. We know once it's released, people will refer to it as "Dr Pepper for the ears" because it will be such a refreshing blend of rich, bold sounds - an instant classic.”I understand the thinking behind this campaign - it's bizarre and random and just the kind of thing that those KUH-RAZY interweb bloggers love to repost and give free viral buzz (case in point) - but it's too bad that whoever came up with this one doesn't read the Cracked blog; we broke the Chinese Democracy story