Who Had the Best Weekend Update Jokes This Week: Colin Jost or Michael Che?
Several Weekend Update alums showed up on Saturday Night Live this weekend, with host Amy Poehler teaming with old anchor-mates Tina Fey and Seth Meyers to take on Michael Che and Colin Jost in a good old-fashioned Joke-Off. But relative new kids Che and Jost were having a great night firing off wisecracks before their SNL forerunners joined the fray.
Who landed the most punchlines, Che or Jost? You make the call…
Jost
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“Well, it is nice to start Update with some good news for once. There is peace in the Middle East. The only downside is there’s war in Chicago. Only Trump could Freaky Friday Chicago and Gaza.”
Che
“President Trump has reportedly become concerned with Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene criticizing Republicans on key issues, with Trump asking, ‘What’s going on with Marjorie?’ Little advice, bro? Let her go. You can’t change her. God knows I’ve tried.”
Jost
“I know Trump is upset that he didn’t win the Nobel Peace Prize, but the last guy to send heavily armed men into an American city was Bane from Batman. Bane, who was also snubbed for the Peace Prize.”
Che
“Many leaders in the Middle East are crediting President Trump with brokering the Israel-Hamas ceasefire, but it makes perfect sense to me because sometimes crazy people only listen to other crazy people. Like, when you see a guy jacking it on the subway, you don’t just ask him to stop. No, you gotta take off your pants, too, and now we can negotiate.”
Jost
“The actual Nobel Peace Prize was awarded this week to Venezuelan opposition leader Maria Corina Machado. Or, as Fox News reported it, ‘Trump Robbed by Deranged Hispanic.’”
Che
“The U.S. Treasury is planning to release a silver dollar with President Trump’s face on it, and then on the other side, he has Harriet Tubman in a headlock.”
Jost
“The Trump administration is also rolling out a video at airports in which Kristi Noem will blame Democrats for flight delays related to the government shutdown. Let’s take a look.”
Che
“OpenAI has updated its video-generating app, Sora, to allow users to create cameos of themselves in video. And they’re pretty realistic. I mean, I made this one before the show.”
Jost
“A growing number of Gen Z men are moving back in with their parents, taking over household chores and calling themselves Trad Sons, replacing the old name, ‘Failures.’”
Che
“Arby’s announced that they are adding a new item to their menu: steak nuggets. Although you can make your own steak nuggets by eating a bunch of Arby’s.”
Jost
“President Trump issued a proclamation ending Indigenous Peoples’ Day and calling Christopher Columbus the original American hero. So while Trump is rounding up people with ICE, he’s praising Columbus, a guy who literally brought boatloads of Hispanics to America.”
Che
“Laszlo Krasznahorkai was awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature for his compelling and visionary oeuvre that, in the midst of apocalyptic terror, reaffirms the power of art. The title of his book: You Gots Ta Wash Yo Ass.”
