The Owner Of The LA Clippers Is A Joyful Screaming Man

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The Owner Of The LA Clippers Is A Joyful Screaming Man

Steve Ballmer is one of the richest people in the world, having been the CEO of Microsoft for 14 years. Among various other status symbols, he owns an NBA team, the Los Angeles Clippers. The man has plenty of reason to be happy. The thing is that when he expresses that happiness, it borders on the kind of lunacy that requires a Hulkbuster to subdue. When Steve took the podium to introduce the Clipper fanbase to their two recently acquired superstars, Kawhi Leonard and Paul George, Ballmer couldn't help but lose all semblance of his mind.

If you've paid any attention to the worlds of tech and sports, you might already be aware of Ballmer's penchant for going from zero to nuclear at even the faintest suggestion of excitement. Here he is being introduced at a Microsoft event during his run as CEO. It's subtle, but pay close attention to how his microphone is slowly turned on and the volume turned up after he's already deep into a single sustained glee-shriek, giving the impression that he's screaming while running at you at full speed to deliver the incredible news that Microsoft Word now contains spellcheck.

Here's a melting Steve Ballmer chanting the word "developers" over and over again, either to praise the work of software developers or to lead a bloodthirsty mob to go kill software developers:

And here's Ballmer during his own introductory press conference after buying the Clippers:

That, along with the footage of pretty much any of his public appearances, including random cutaways to him reacting to foul calls during Clippers games with such wild gesticulation that it looks like he's trying to communicate with someone through soundproof glass, collectively act as proof that Ballmer will not go gentle into that good night. No, someday, in all likelihood, he will spontaneously combust while announcing the new lowered price of arena popcorn.

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