But don't worry, the villainous Panda-La is defeated when Baloo detonates their fortress in a gigantic explosion, which they totally deserved for being shifty assholes.
Walt Disney Television Animation
Take that, misnomers!
So, yeah ... Disney filmed a cartoon reenactment of the attack on Pearl Harbor using characters from The Jungle Book and a bunch of evil pandas. "Last Horizons" was banned (albeit temporarily) for its stereotypical portrayal of Asians, and also for possibly trying to justify nuking Japan to a bunch of unsuspecting kids who just wanted to watch some cartoon bears.
The Twilight Series: Catholics Are (Literal) Monsters
Twilight is a piece of fan fiction about not having sex with a vampire before marriage, but still obeying his every whim and command, because that is your duty as a woman.
The Horrible Message:
Catholics don't appreciate the dangerous fantasy of the Twilight universe, because the main villains in the series are part of what is essentially the Vampire Vatican.
No, really. The undead of Twilight are ruled by a secretive group called the Volturi. They are headquartered in Italy (hint), ruling from a large, domed, basilica-like building (big hint), and they claim the right to tell other vampires how to live their lives (Hint Eastwood). The evil vampire Illuminati is structured exactly like the Catholic Church.
"No vampire will use a dental dam while sucking blood. It's not natural."
And when someone breaks one of their sacred rules, the Volturi have a few handy sadists to interrogate/torture the heretics. For instance, the powerful Volturi Jane loves to torture people with her psychic ability to make them feel like they are being burned alive. Looking at her, you wouldn't expect her to be so vicious. But then again, nobody expects the Vampire Inquisition.
"Our chief weapons are surprise and crippling psychic agony!"
In Breaking Dawn, one free-thinking vampire even tells the Volturi, "We never put on white hats and called ourselves saints." It makes even more sense when you consider that the author of the Twilight series, Stephanie Meyer, is a practicing member of the Mormon faith -- an unofficial branch of Christianity long at odds with Catholicism. Catholicism in turn considers Mormonism to be the religious equivalent of a weirdo slumber party full of all the kids no one wants to hang out with. So it makes sense that Meyer would use her bestselling novels to call Catholics a bunch of evil, self-righteous parasites. Feel free to try to figure out on your own who the werewolves are supposed to be.
Ian Ury is Pip Ury's twin brother and likes to write for Cracked and stuff. If you wanna comment drop him an E-mail at IanMartinUry@gmail.com or follow him on Facebook, Twitter or his blog.
There's a few other products you should probably avoid if you aren't into that whole racism thing. Check out what a bigot Sherlock Holmes really was in The 6 Most Secretly Racist Classic Children's Books. Or see the Justice League's rampant racism in the Seanbaby classic 5 Shockingly Racist Scenes In Famous Superhero Comics.
Subscribe to our YouTube channel and see why even LOTR is just wall-to-wall bigotry in 6 Reasons Lord Of The Rings Is Racist, and watch other videos you won't see on the site!
Also follow us on Facebook, because we love you for who you are.