If there's anyone who's worth a damn in this SHITPILE we call LIFE, it's you, Chah-lie. You're a fine boy? finer than the long legs on a Pennsylvania farmgirl takin' cookies TO THE RODEO! HOOO-WAA! You want I should go yell at your school again?
So my point, right Chah-lie, met a woman at the grocery. A beautiful woman. Beautiful. I could smell it. Mmmmm? Could smell that she'd eaten a hamburger with pickles last Wednesday? And her shoelaces were green with a double knot. Her parents descended from the Hapsburg dynasty; she was born on a Tuesday, Chah-lie! Ruby f****n' Tuesday. Can't you just smell it, Chah-lie? HOOO-WAA!
Actually, what you're smelling now, Chah-lie, is not a woman. No. Hoo-wa. Those are my trousers. Excuse me for a moment, would ya? I need to relinquish these drawls.
I FOOLED YA CHAH-LIE, I GOT YA CAR KEYS AND HANDCUFFED YA TO THE BED! HOO-WA! VEGAS, HERE I COME! SCENT OF MY DUST, SUCKA!
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