The 2006 Winter Olympics are upon us, LIVE in... somewhere in Europe, and CRACKED's got all the exclusive coverage you could ever want! Screw that! We actually have more than you'd want! By the time you're finished with our coverage, you're going to be so fucking sick of the Olympics you won't be able to look at a bobsleigh without screaming!

Interested in the Biathlon? Curling? Luge? Skiing? Of course you aren't! You probably like real sports! But you'd better damn well
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pretend to like 'em over the next few weeks, or risk being labelled un-American! As for us at CRACKED, we're excited as hell about the Winter Olympics! How excited, you ask? How does six more exclamation marks grab you?!!!!!! FUCK YES!


Welcome to the Olympics, Idiot
You know you're dumber than Bob Costas, but you can't say it as well as he can.

CRACKED FAQ: Winter Olympics Sports
Think the Winter Olympics are ridiculous? You're absolutely correct! Here's why.

Useful Italian Phrases
All the phrases you'll need to get around at the Olympics.

Rejected Olympics Mascots
Here are a few of the Olympics mascots turned down by Italy.

Olympic Village Illustration
Click around to explore our Olympic Village.