Bored101, yer a retard. I'm a wiccan, that makes me a pagan, deal with it. This was hilarious BTW X3

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lol thats funny, if your religious or not people appreciate it for being humour and do not take it literally.

Is it just me, or have some of the people who post here not heard of sarcasm? Who cares if the facts are correct or not? A lot of them are just widely-accepted jokes about the religions. It's like getting pissed off because someone said that every Jew is a lawyer, doctor, dentist, or accountant. Seriously, guys. Lighten up. Religion is now and always will be funny. And for all you guys who are knocking the believers...do you really have to tell them you think they're misinterpreting their faith? I'm willing to bet they know it a little better than you do. If a Mormon says he's a Christian and a Muslim says he believes in the same god as the other monotheists, more power to them. What irks me is that they left out Zoroastrianism. That is some weird shit.

Jesus takes one of your socks... hah, that had me rolling.

It's a little late now, but to correct Nox: yes, Jews DO believe in an afterlife. It's called Olam Ha-Ba. You can read about it at http://www.jewfaq.org/olamhaba.htm Maybe you don't believe in it if you're a Reform/liberal Jew, but the 200-year-old branch of Judaism hardly speaks for all Jews. And even many liberal Jews believe in an afterlife.

hey bored101, wiccans are by definition pagan. a pagan is anyone who practices a religion not affilliated with the semitic God, therefore, anyone not Christian, Jewish, or Muslim. So, a little more research on YOUR part before you comment again.

A cracked Editor, A mormon, And purists on a rowboat... Damn, can't make a joke out of that...Those Scientologists bastards already traced me.

Hey AMormon, chill out man. We athiests got slammed here, too. it's kinda difficult when your official dogma is "nuh-uh." I particularly liked the bit about scientology. milk an alien. tee hee!.

wiccans and pagans. not the same thing. more research please.

A couple more things...Mormons are christian. We believe in Christ. We do not believe in the holy trinity rather we believe that the father, son, and the holy ghost are three diffrent people with the father and the son having a body of flesh and bone and the holy ghost with only spirit. Then we do not believe women should be eternally pregnant. We believe that we should multiply and replenish the earth according to what God reveals through personal revelation. LDS families range from a no children to several depending on what the couple agrees on.

Hey your facts on Mormon's are sort of correct and sort of not. First of all the marriage at 16 is FLDS (which are commonly mistaken for Mormons). LDS (Mormon) don't marry until at least 19 and most of the time only the girl marries at that age and the guy is around 21. Then the underware is garments and represents a covenant between us and God. We do not believe that it protects us from all harm. Then we believe sex is only for after marriage because it is a God given power. Go to the official website (lds.org) before you start claiming random MYTHS.

i hate to be nitpicky, but there is at least the implication of separation of church and state in american law. it's called the first ammendment. while it's definitely up to interpretation how far this should go, it basically says that the government shouldn't preference any religion (or lack of a religion) over another , and that the people should be free to express their religious beliefs. as for aero-D's bizarre claims, removing religious preference from government institutions is actually endorsed by the first amendment, and not in any way intolerant. i think sometimes the desire to cleanse our culture from religious bias goes too far, but not in any way that really threatens anyone's wellbeing. also, i'm pretty sure the second amendment is at least as mis-interpreted as the first, which is actually pretty clear. but i won't get into that. and finally, i will never get how when a new sect of a religion forms, the older sects refuse to acknowledge it as part of "their" religion. it's actually very bizarre and downright childish.

Isn't this from Colbert's new book?

fantastic article, the Wicca section was brilliant. Also, PCHU PCHU = best sound ever. Stealing it.

Scientology, I believe, is a dangerous death cult thta may have instigated 9/11 and e fall of Rome... More seriously scientology is bad and will be PWND

So many things to discuss. First, the statement about separation from church and state is the most mis-interpereted part of the constitution. It states that we can pray to whomever we want in any public forum. We can read and share any religeous texts or beliefs without oppression. It has basicly turned into: don't let me see or hear something I may not agree with. They have the constitutional right to pray, and you have the constitutional right to plug your ears. You just do not have the right to stop them. As for this country turning Christian, actually the opposite is happening. In the last 30 years we have lost school prayer of any kind. Our military chaplains must make their prayers generic. The display of crosses and the ten commandments (which is shared by Christians and Jews) are being forceably taken down. The US is quickly becoming religeously intollerant! Last comment - Jess, Hate to tell you but Mormonism IS NOT a branch of Christianity. Mormons believe that Jesus was just the son of God, not God in human form. Mormons also do not believe in Christs salvation as much as they enforce deeds and doctrine. Denying Christ's gift of salvation and his true divinity is against all Christian doctrine.

1) You missed Satanism, which is basically all about telling people to FUCK OFF. Really. It's the official religion of classic punk rock, too! 2) You kinda misunderstood wicca. They're a bunch of pussies (literally, you got the all-girl bit right) with books about nature. They don't have dark spells. If you want to think people to death, join up with satanism! Simply send $200 to the Church of Satan, and remember: YOU'RE AS EVIL AS YOU THINK YOU ARE.

Could you be any more wrong about these religions? Jesus, did you people even look into this shit? And how is becoming a Mormon an alternative to Christianity? It's simply a different branch. Nice one.

So basically no research was done on any of these religions I'm guessing?