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Sure, who hasn't wished for superpowers? Super-speed, super-flight, super-strength-these are the cool powers, the ones with which all comic book superheroes seem to do so well for themselves. But there are a few lesser-known powers found in the funny pages that nobody wants to be saddled with. Any practical use they have would be countered by the sheer embarrassment and/or inconvenience of having them. #9.
Then again, like most people, you're probably sort of a prick. Do you really want to know what other people think of you? Sometimes the only way you can get through the day dealing with other people is being able to convince yourself they're not five seconds from gut-punching your dumb ass. Telepathy means you'll never have that comforting illusion ever again. Try hearing, "He really put on some weight," "Nice hair, douchebag, did Supercuts have a coupon day?" and "Has this guy ever heard of deodorant?" before breakfast, and the phrase "Ignorance is bliss" will start making a lot of sense all of a sudden. #8.
Super-intelligence
Remember how much everyone hated that kid? Okay, now add "super-intelligence" to your list of powers, where suddenly you can argue foreign policy with Nobel Laureates while doing long division in your head and scribbling a cure for leukemia on a notepad. You're gonna turn into an insufferable jerk faster than you can say, "Well, I suppose that's a simplified way of looking at it." Lex Luthor may be a genius, but nobody's inviting his smug ass to their house parties. |
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Oh, Magnetism on a knife would be lovely until it spins out of your control and stabs you in the hand. Magneto's power is more like telekinesis for metals.
Female goats can have horns too. Dolt.
Um... with the horns on that goat, and where he's holding it to 'milk' it... there's a reason that's bitter; that's not milk.
Wait, wasn't "super-eating" featured in the "People with real-life super powers" article? C'mon, Cracked, make up your minds already!
Or Why oh why God, did you make me stupid enough to cross a busy street without looking first while invisible?
yeah, but if you're invisible, who's gonna help you when you cross the street and get hit by a car because the driver didn't see you? then you'd just have to roll in the street screaming in pain as you wonder why, god, why did you choose such a lame superpower...
poor, poor aquaman...i pity your lameness.
I wonder if The Dark Knight will beat Aquaman as the highest grossing comic film ever.
Gary, the reason Aquaman blows is because he's a Sub-Mariner ripoff, but for some reason they took away invulnerability and flight when they took the idea (normally when you plagiarize a hero, you try to keep him at least as useful as the guy you stole).
I wonder how long it took for Superman to get his super-breath under control. I can just imagine a super-baby crying and blowing the roof off his house in the process!
aqua man has super human strength everybody looks at him unjustly maybe he shoud break more buildings
What about being able to pass through solid objects? Kitty and DJ are two good examples of why that power would kick ass.
If you REALLY had super-intelligence, you should be smart enough not to rub it into everyone's faces.
If you could have *voluntary* telepathy it'd still be pretty damn awesome. If it just went non-stop, you'd prolly go insane. That's another drawback.
http://bux.to/?r=Requin
what a bunch of losers
All the same telepathy would be pretty cool, cause even if u couldn't MAKE someone give u a wad of cash, you could read the bank teller's mind and figure out a way to get this wad of cash pretty simple. But it seems more like a supervilan power, 'cause i see a huge opening to be emperor of the universe from that angle.
Joolz makes a good point. If a site does not match your taste, you have the choice to ignore it. Also, if you insist on being a smart-ass, you had better be damn sure of what you're talking about. People who are loyal to a site have a tendency of tearing into arrogant malcontents.
tommee, only retards who havent heard of limewire use itunes. or anything you have to pay for. and yeh lord drayakir u r the biggest simpleton (really who the hell uses that as an insult?) in here for you dont even understand what your talking about.
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a good one would have been Rouges....because who would want to go their whole life without touching anyone? That would have be horrible