Today is Halloween (unless you live in New Zealand, where Halloween was over an hour before this article was published; go to bed). The point is, even if you're just sitting down to read this at 8:30 p.m. local time, YOU STILL HAVE AMPLE TIME TO HOLD A HALLOWEEN RAGER. All you need is 45 minutes and $50 (and a willingness to become the pariah of your social circle).
Don't believe us? We tasked Cracked writer Evan Symon with assembling a speed-run Halloween party using some rather dubious tips he found on the Internet. The only rules?
RULE 1: He could use only common household items purchased at a neighborhood drug store.
RULE 2: He was required to hold this party in his bathroom. Because. Just because.