And this wasn't one or two people making a mistake: 700 staff lined the marathon course and should have noticed when dozens of exhausted children were suddenly competing against full-grown athletes. Most of the kids eventually gave up, but Abbasi shrugged and punched out another 9.5 miles for the heck of it.
We assume this led to tons of nonsensical "Running Hood" headlines in terrible local papers.
9-Year-Old Runs Away to Vegas
In our post-9/11 world, airports are seemingly on high alert 24/7. While security slip-ups happen from time to time, there's no way that everyone involved could mess up so badly that a 9-year-old ends up on a plane alone without a ticket, right?
Well, that just happened over the weekend. Yes, the boy went through all of the airport's security checkpoints and even managed to get a free meal by running off when the bill arrived. Then he got on a plane bound for Las Vegas and no one noticed anything amiss until halfway through the flight.
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"I don't care what the manifest says; that is not Dr. Harold Tanaka. Call it a gut feeling."
Given his string of maniac good luck, we're pretty sure that the Luxor Sphinx would've sprung to life and become the boy's magical new best friend if those killjoys in Protective Services hadn't intervened.
Kathy wrote a very funny book, and you can buy it here and here.