The polar vortex. Heat waves. Dinosaur erotica. Chinese smog. Depending on your outlook on life, these are either randomly strung together words or surefire signs that impending doom is nigh. And if the former reasons don't have you convinced that you should hop in the old fallout shelter, then surely these news tidbits will.
5 Giant Jesus Statue Struck by Lightning
Rio de Janeiro recently suffered a brutal rain and lightning storm that knocked out their electricity and flooded the streets. Things took a more interesting turn, however, when the 125-foot-tall statue of Jesus that overlooks the town was struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. Luckily, a photographer happened to catch the exact moment the statue was struck with a fuckload of gigawatts.
"BY THE POWER OF GOD-SKULL!"
Jesus' right thumb was "severely damaged," adding to the injuries his middle finger suffered last month. Either God is super mad at Jesus' digits for some reason, or the forces of darkness are getting the upper hand.