Stuff like this guarantees that Apple's newest product stays in the news and continues to sell out in record time even months after its release. Either they're marketing geniuses (they are), or we as a consuming public are covetous maniacs (we are). The worst part is ...
We Don't Need to Upgrade, Because We Hardly Use Any Apps
Here's a breakdown of the relatively minor differences between the iPhone 6 and the iPhone 5S that the vast majority of us will never, ever read. Why? Because at the end of the day, it really doesn't matter how well the 6 outperforms the 5S, because we're going to use it to do the exact same shit.
Think about what you do with your phone -- send texts, make calls, check social media, play terrible games, and send immediately regrettable photographs to people you just met. Unless you're a professional photographer, you're not going to care about how much the camera has improved on the iPhone 6 (and if you are a professional photographer, you probably take pictures on something better than a goddamn iPhone). And for those of you who game -- nothing playable on the iPhone really needs a huge upgrade in power. Just look what happened when they tried to sell Angry Birds on actual gaming systems. So what do we need the better specs for? To have more apps? Not according to the hard numbers.
"There's an app for that!" -no actual person, apparently
The average American smartphone owner downloads zero apps a month. Zero. The top 7 percent of smartphone owners download nearly half of all the downloaded apps each month -- these are the people who spend so much time immersed in their devices that they have forgotten how to interact with other human beings. As for the rest of us, we don't need any more apps. And since we don't need apps, we don't need phones with 10 percent more speed, or whatever Apple is offering with their latest several-hundred-dollar status badge. Forty-two percent of all our app time is spent on whichever app we use the most, dividing the remaining 58 percent among all the other apps. So when you ask yourself if you really need a new phone just because there's a new phone out there to buy, the answer is pretty much always going to be no. Unless you're Zack Morris. Then it's probably time for an upgrade.
The third part of XJ's epic science-fiction novel is out now on Amazon. The first 99 cent novella can be found here, with Part 2 out here. Or leave a review and get a free copy! Poke him on Twitter and follow him on Facebook.
For more smartphone shenanigans, see 4 Signs Apple Has Completely Given Up on Being Cool and 5 New Apps Explicitly Designed for Awful Human Beings.